Omg

I have a friend named Roxanne, who I have known since I started high school and who I have been through all the typical teenager stuff with; teasing teachers, copying each other's homework, spending the night watching horror movies, climbing a tree to eat a whole pint of ice cream in it, having the usual girl talk, comforting each other when we had been hurt by our parents or a member of the male race(she mostly got hurt by her parents, I was the one getting hurt by the boys). Over all we made the high school hell quite a bit easier for each other. 

She has always been the one who looked quite simple, with little expectations, at teenage relationships. When I got together with someone I had been twisting around for two years and completely lost my heart to him, she was the one to support me and be happy for me, but also the one to tell me that most relationships don't last at this age, and that I should watch our for being hurt. She herself had a lot of flings(she must've kissed over a dozen guys before she turned sixteen) and fell in love with an ******* who hurt her quite bad. She was never the one anyone expected to have a longlasting relationship.

However, a few months ago she suddenly met a guy named Jim, who she got in a relationship with quite fast. She was happy, but in the beginning we(her friends) didn't expect it to last very long. To our surprise they made it through the first six months. In those months she has been through quite a lot with him, until last Friday Jim's father suddenly passed away. Jim found him dead in his house, having had a heart attack, fallen against a closet and bled to death. As expected, he broke down, and Roxanne has been with him and stayed away from school to take care of him ever since. As I heard, he is doing relatively okay right now.

Today I contacted her because I miss her, and she then told me they decided to get engaged at her birthday(which will be in 10 days). My first reaction was... shock. Even disbelief. We are seventeen. She has a year of high school to go. And most of all, she never believed in teenage relationships. Yet they both seem very serious about it, and I guess that's what touches me. It feels strange to know that the friend I spent all my high school time with, is suddenly doing something so... adult like, while I have no idea what is going to become of me. My relationship with the one I love has failed due to complications, his depressions and trauma's, misunderstandings, the fact he hasn't even begun to grow up yet. I kind of feel like a kid, while she has found the one she intends to stay with all her life. This reminded me of the fact that I am supposed to become an adult within a year, and it kind of frightened me.

Yet I am so happy for them both. I don't know if it's going to last forever, but they believe it will and that is enough, at least for the time to come. When I see them together I can tell that they believe it. That is a very touching sight. Sad, confused and heartbroken as I am, I completely forgot about my shattered heart and shred beliefs, about how badly I would've wanted this with my loved one, and I did not feel any jealousy at all. That fact almost surprised me. 

Today, I am happier than I have been in a long time, and I'm not even happy for myself. I know it might not last forever, but I also know that I will pray for the two of them and ask for it to last. I definitely will.

JojaRodenaLente JojaRodenaLente
18-21, F
Mar 18, 2009