Why?

Its been a year now and i've held this in. I joined this webpage just so that i can vent. I remember this just like it was yesterday...

I was 16 when i met what i thought was "the one". I understand ur probably thinking 'oh just another young naive girl who probably didnt even know the meaning of "love"' but trust me,i really fell hard for this guy.

I gave him 2 years of my life, and for what? Endless nites of regret and wasted tears. I met him in savannah when i spent summer with my cusen. Real good looking too, and since i have a thing for army guys, i gave him a chance with positive thoughts. I wasnt planning on falling for this guy,i was thinking more along the lines of a "summer fling". But the words he told me and his actions simply pulled me twords him to the point where i basically dedicated my life to him. We dated for two years,i gave him ALL of me. He took my innocence because i really thought this was the guy i wanted to spend my whole life with.

Days passed and we began to grow apart. I did all i could to keep the relationship going. I really tried my best): i didnt want what we had to end, but it felt like i was the only one putting effort in. He was soo careless, soo mean to me...just a whole side of him i didnt know existed. And yet i still kept trying.

Then one day while i was at work, i got a text that simply said "we'r done" and i immediatly broke down on the spot. I didnt care who was watching, i was literally broken down to peices. Two years i dedicated to him and he just threw it away like a balled up peice of paper. I left my job that day because the pain was too intense. I just wanted to die. I called him more then 50 times and every call was forwarded to his voicemail. I wanted an explanation.

I tried to be a good girlfriend. I never cheated,i never disrespected him, everything he wanted i handed to him on a golden platter. And yet he was still unhappy. Now its been a year and i still get that empty numb painfull feeling. And now and then i find myself crying because i miss him soo much. What gets me is the fact that i love someone who wants nothing to do with me. Its the worst feeling ever and i cant escape it. To this day i still want an explanation as to whu he just left me like that...so harshly as though he has no heart and no feelings. I always think its my
Fault because maybe i didnt try hard enough. Just wanted to share my story, it feels good to finally get this off my chest.i highly doubt i'll
Ever forget him...but good things always come to an end. Im proud of myself that im still living and breathing and im trying my hardest to move on(:
BrokenPeices93 BrokenPeices93
18-21, F
Sep 22, 2012