That's How I Was Brought Up

I don't know how to let someone see my pain.

Throughout my childhood it was drilled into me that you never let anybody know feel bad, be it in pain, depressed, or angry. If you aren't happy, don't show it. Pretend you are happy.

I was told when I was growing up nobody cares how I feel. They don't want to know. They don't want to help. Don't bother them with your problems and just bottle everything up inside and say you are fine.

This is why I can't get a therapist to treat me. I can't go in and let it all down. I say I'm going to go in and tell them how I really feel, but it never happens. The Little Miss Mary Sunshine mask comes on and they tell me I don't seemed depressed and they wouldn't be able to do anything to help.

I guess after all these years I got really good at it.
PunchyFruit PunchyFruit
36-40, F
1 Response Sep 28, 2012

You can let it all out. Believe it or not there are some of us who live to help others with there problems but you must be willing to open up and show the real you. You must be able to take off your mask and trust someone with who you are and how you feel. Trust me it is well worth it.