The other day I was very suicidal. But my friend came over despite my complaints that I was "sick". She convinced me to take a walk with her, so I did. While we were walking and making conversation she missunderstood something I said with "I just want to die" She looked at me worried and said "why do you want to die?" I then paniked a bit and told her that she had missunderstood and corrected her. She laughed and said "You're too much of a happy person to be suicidal anyway"... If she only knew... But i'm too scared to tell anyone because i'm always labeled as being the happy go lucky person, but it's really just the mask.