His Ex Is Cheesing Me Off And So Is He, The Way Things Are Being Handled.

My boyfriend of 4 years (into our 5th year now) has an ex girlfriend from 15 years ago.    

Unfortunately they have a child together - who is 15.   The duration of their relationship was 2 years on and off.

He is one of those poor fathers who has not been allowed to see his child and yet has been paying full child support (via the CSA)   He spent a fortune in the courts etc.,. but his ex has blatently dismissed any of the rules.

Still................   last year, she surprised us by cancelling the CSA payments.   

But she phones my bf a lot and texts him.   In the main the calls and texts are mega abusive.   sometimes they are not.    She has now twisted it to tell him that he was never there for his daughter.    She in a bid to get his attention a few weeks ago left a message to say she was going to kill herself if he didn't contact her.   She also wanted him to go out with her and said he could see the daughter if he did.    

Oh deary me.    Why can't he see that this is all attention seeking stuff.    Maybe he likes it aye - having her more or less begging him now to visit her.

A big factor is, is that I too have a child with and ex hubby.   Now, he doesn't hassle me - nor me he.   We were married for 9 years and I left him for current boyfriend.    When we do talk it is most amicably and generally speaking about our child.   Ie:  If for some reason (very rare) that he can't collect him from school.   My bf almost loses the plot when I tell him if me and my ex have spoken.

Im just getting very very fed up of all this.    

Im wondering whether or not to call his ex (as I have her phone number) - oh she doesn't know I even exist.   And just ask her what exactly is her problem?

It would annoy my bf but at the moment of writing, Im thinking wtf!!!!!   Why should I be the one who has to always behave nicely and rise above everything?


anyone any thoughts - there is lots lots more to this..... but would appreciate any other words.    

luckyblackcat luckyblackcat
46-50, F
Feb 16, 2010