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**** That

just like i said in the title

**** that

should be legal grounds for divorce


definitely isn't the life my Wonder and I will have
deleted deleted 26-30 9 Responses Jan 29, 2008

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unrulywoman, i'm sorry you get assh-les on your board; and i agree with msterling45...its never too late [or atleast it shouldnt be]. i hope things get better for you.

ms, there was nothing hating or bitter in my post. I was simply making a point and challenging you to think about what you said.



Please allow me to try again: You say that a sexless marriage "should be legal grounds for divorce" and that it "definitely isn't the life my Wonder and I will have"



I am asking you with respect and honesty: If Wonder came down with a medical condition that prevented her from ever having sex again, would you still say "**** that" and get a divorce or would you honor your vows to stay through "better or worse"?



AND, would you expect the same from her if you were afflicted?

I'm glad you get these guys commenting on your stuff instead of me getting that crap masterling. lol

He seems to have something stuck in his ahhhhhh crawl or somewhere. lol Guy got up on the wrong side of the bed or something this morning didn't he? lol What a comment....

and seriously, the members of this group dont go into the 'i am in a sexless marriage group' and start commenting about how great sex is with our partner....why come over here and tell us give it a few years and you'll see.....the truth is not everyone will end up sexless, and those who have shouldnt be bitter towards those who are happy.....

dude, some of you guys are just rude....the title of this group is 'i hope' i dont end up in a sexless marriage..... the truth is we have no clue how to handle something like that because as of right now, we've never experienced anything like it. at this point in my life i feel the same way as ms, 'f-ck that'.....we're not saying that its an impossible possiblity, we're just saying that it would suck....anyone in the situation could probably confirm that it does suck......



and in response to orchids comment, i've given it 7 yrs, had 3 kids, had a mortgage, had a foreclosure.....and i'm still having sex......apparently it doesnt work so well for some but thats why the title of this group is 'i hope i dont end up in a sexless marriage'......

What amazes me about this thread is the incredible lack of compassion and sensitivity. That is what ms was being slammed for. Yes, every marriage has it's ups and downs but until you're temporary sexlessness has gone on for 6 months, a year, 5 years, 10 years and MORE, then you simply have no clue what you are talking about.



So, ms, when your wife comes down with a medical condition that completely precludes her from having sex for the rest of her life, how will you 'handle' it:



"**** that, Wonder, I'm in control of my life and your illness doesn't concern me and I am not going to let it get in the way of my getting laid, one way or another."



or maybe...



"**** that, Wonder, take a pill and blow me."



or maybe...



"**** that, Wonder. I don't care about that 'better or worse' bullsh*t, you can't screw, I'm getting a divorce."



Or what about you Tate?



"C'mon honey. I know you have this debilitating disease and are in constant pain but let's get creative! Maybe if you just lie there with your mouth open I can creatively get off without hurting you."



or maybe...



"C'mon honey, mind over matter, babe. Think yourself into perfect health so we can get it on."



UW is right, knowledge is power. And ignorance is bliss. Good to see there are still some blissful people in the world. I hope you guys NEVER have to deal with this issue. I wouldn't wish it on anybody.



Peace & Love, y'all

Unfortunately, eventually it may become a trade-off. Stay with sexless marriage, love your wife for who she is regardless of lack of sex, stay living with spouse to raise your kids. Etc, etc, etc. Everyone has to make their own decisions based on their experiences and needs. but until you live it, it is hard to imagine ending up in a sexless marriage, even with all the precautions we take to prevent it......

its not as simple as any of those things unfortunately and seldom can you see the signs on the front end of the relationship. Relationships over time change just as the two people do. At first being enmeshed and entangled is cute many years later it may be grounds for leaving..but when there are children,relatives, friends and property involved things aren't so black and white.



there is no pill to take and you can't change your partner. oh and hormones, depression, disease and stress can all take their toll..none of these are grounds for divorce..imho



differentiation is a path that few choose but most healthy relationships have gone through some form of it..the irony is that by focusing on yourself and what you need you actually have something to give.



I would highly recommend Schnarch's "Passionate Marriage" ..this is a guide to an amazing relationship..but you both have to be on board.



my .02

god forbid you ever get impotent....