I Drink Alone, When I Feel Alone.

Drinking alone eases the stress in my life.  All the things I worry about, love, bills, money, aren't 't so heavy for awhile. I feel no stress and everything seems less important when I drink alone. I like drinking alone when I'm lonely, because it numbs the pain of missing someone special. When drinking with friends I feel like I have to hold myself together and I lose the relax sensation it gives me. Lonely it relieves the tension in my mind. I lay on the bathroom floor and just let it all out when I get to the point of being "drunk". Screaming, kicking, self damage, crying and fighting with myself, I get all the anger and frustration that's in my body, out. The next morning I feel refreshed and ready for what ever comes my way. It may seem silly, but I feel stronger for it, making it through the rough spot in my life. I don't drink every night anymore, I wish I did but I can't.

    I would rather drink alone, I don't trust my self with friends, even good friends. Losing control of myself is not something I enjoy, becoming a complete fool in front of people I respect or don't know is not pleasant for me. One night I was drinking at a friends house and I was with my best friend, we had gotten a bottle of SoCo just the two of us. It was a friends birthday, and his friend asked us to "flash" him. K and I thought about it for a little while and we both agreed. I oddly enough don't regret it as much as I feel I should I just wish I wasn't't drunk.


I rather be lonely drinking then in a group. 

I drink alone for my own reasons.

RocksOnTheMoon RocksOnTheMoon
Feb 24, 2010