I want to cry right now I've taken up drinking because it numbs the pain of my self disgust I'm drunk right now and want to kill myself I hate myself because I crossdress I thought I had accepted it as part of me but now I realize I haven't yet and it's tearing me apart I need help because I've told my mom and she's accepted it about me but I was expecting a bit more of a reaction or some curiosity but no she dropped it and hasn't talked to me about it since I told her and I want to cry I'm just at the end of my rope and want to use it to hang myself I I I don't know what to do I'm gonna lose and and slip I kinda want to go to my new high school dressed up but my school discourages crossdressing and my friends that don't know I crossdress talk about crossdresser like there is something wiener with them and that's what's killing me I guess idk I guess it's part of being in high school and being a teenager and being a crossdresser while drunk and idk I'm just lost I need someone my age who understands I just I can't go on like this much longer......
JulieCakes JulieCakes
18-21, M
4 Responses Aug 24, 2014

Drinking isn't going to make it better. It's better to talk about it

Nothing wrong with wearing girls clothes all of us cders started just like you at a young age. Don't do anything stupid. Their are a lot of cders in the world today.
If your mom has excepted it, ask her to help you buy girls clothes that will look good on you. She will be a trainer for you and she can make you into a girl for sure.

You just got to hide your girlishness from everyone till you get out of school and can dress as you want. Everyone has gone thru the same thing as you wanting to be excepted as a girl, but if your friends knew, then they would tell the whole school and it will make it hard for you to learn anything.
It is better just to keep it at home in your room or you mom may let you dress in the house too. Ask your mom to let you have some girl time a few times a week. Maybe if she goes away, she will let you dress then.
I dressed all the time at home and know one knew about me till I was 14, and that is because I wanted people to know I liked to wear dresses, SO I told people.

Im12 but have not told any1 yet so don't beat your self up

I tried dressing to be somebody else after being molested. I understand