Letter To My Heart

Dear Heart :
I know you feel everything 110 % and you find nothing wrong with expressing how you feel. You don't remember all the nights I stayed awake wondering and hurting. How can you forget the millions of times we have cried ? How can you forget the PAIN and the pieces of you that were torn away ? I know you feel the fear that makes my blood run cold whenever I cionsider letting someone in.
When my tongue gets twisted and I can't say any normal words. When I would rather have my tongue cut out than say the wrong thing.
I get so nervous that I can't say anything or I say the CRAZIEST stuff. If I wasn't such a dork maybe it wouldn't be so hard for me.
I just want you to consider me and how I am before you pull me and torture my mind with never ending thoughts of someone.
I can't make anyone feel what they don't no matter how much you PUSH. So please think about that and the pieces of you that are already lost and blown away. Life unfortunatly is not about what's on the inside . And as you know we are lacking in the outside department. So remember me when you feel that tiny twinge every time he say the "right " or "wrong" things.
When you are in on it , you make it hurt so much worse. You cause me to pull away or try to move too fast before he dissapears.
So my heart even though your barely there any more you have the power to move me or shut me down for a long time.
Funny how I never noticed this till now , how one person can mean so much in a life less ordinary.
Much love and light ~~~~ Alex
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May 19, 2012