I Wish I'd Met Him In a Different Time In My Life

It was a lonely period when my life just was just about working and hanging out with friends that I met this guy. Later on I found out he was friends with my cousin's boyfriend which made our relationship very convenient. My cousin didn't know of our relationship but she wouldn't have objected even though there was a ten year age difference.

My cousin went away on a four month trip and I had agreed to move into her house while she was away. Her boyfriend would always come to see how I was doing but he'd also bring his friend and one day his friend came over by himself asking me if I'd make him some Cd's. It was harmless enough but when I looked at him. All I could see was this handsome dark-skinned man that paid me all the attention I ever needed. We became quite relaxed with each other as we sat on the carpet and tapped our thoughts into the laptop. We joked and laughed until he reached over and kissed me. I was shocked and amazed but he felt so good.

We soon began our sexual assault of each other and it lasted for months. We really got into each other and one day he decided he was going to tell me everything about himself. He first disclosed to me that he had eight children with only the twins having the same mother. He said he'd went crazy after his first child's mother was killed in an automobile accident. He explained that he took comfort in arms of women that he never cared for and never loved but that everyone seemed to want a child from him and had decided he was going to take care of his responsibilities.

I didn't know how to respond to that other than to shake my head. I felt at that moment it was over and that I wouldn't ever be with him the way he was now asking me to be. However after the int ital shock I was still willing to see him again and five months later he told me that he loved me. I stammered because I really didn't want to hear those words. Those words would be my end and I knew it. He didn't let me off that easy. For the next week or so he would call me and ask me if I loved him back or was I just with him for the sex and nothing else. I finally gave in after a few weeks and told him how I felt about the whole thing. He listened and then ask if I could bare it or did I feel this was too much.

So far I'm still pining for him and miss him so much but I know that it is unrealistic for me to be with him. He's just someone I fell in love with that I can't have.

kittkatt38 kittkatt38
36-40, F
1 Response Dec 8, 2008

Sad story but I can understand your position.