I Recharge When I'm Alone

People seem to suck the life right out of me.  My daughter is an extrovert, and she sulks whenever I try to hide out from her.  It drives me nuts how she always seems to need to be attached to me (she's grown, but still lives at home by the way).  Sometimes I feel like hiding out.


youngonce youngonce
46-50, F
3 Responses Jan 11, 2010

You could ask your daughter or suggest for her to: <br />
a) encourage her to get out more<br />
b) encourage her to make new friends<br />
c) find a new hobby<br />
d) walk every day <br />
e) join a garden club<br />
d) volunteer her time at a hospital<br />
<br />
You could<br />
a) Give her a time fr<x>ame when to move out<br />
b) Help her look forward to moving out and get her excited about living on her own<br />
c) Find a new friend so she won't worry about you being alone.<br />
d) Walk with her every day so you have together time--that will be enough for you and at least she would have some time with you--it could be a co-dependent type of issue she has that she is dealing with. <br />
e) help her look for an apartment close to you so she won't feel so alone<br />
<br />
I know when my daughter was 18 I helped her find an apartment of her own (she was so difficult do deal with you have no idea) we worked in the same building and drove together each morning so I gave her 6 months to save for an apartment and my husband helped her find a cute studio 6 blocks away. Later she moved to the burbs then farther out, she moved a lot but we were always there for her. Now she is married with a 7 year old girl and 7 month old boy she has done so well on her own from when she was 18-30 I am so proud that she made it on her own...and is she. <br />
<br />
Just a mothers two cents worth.

It is like psychic vampires people who suck all the life out of you and leave you weak. I had a lot of people come to me and say once I get off of the phone after talking to this person I feel so drained or once they leave I am so drained and just want to sleep...your daughter may be draining your emotionally, physically and financially too. I think you just need your space and she is crowding your space. Our space is our space and we like to do what we want in our space, when we want to, without anyone questioning us. I feel your daughter is interfering in your space like you said and you are not defending your territory so to speak. You might have to give her a time fr<x>ame or when she needs to find her own place somewhere else. so you can have your own territory/space back. You need your space like we all do...<br />
Hugs<br />

I also feel like being around certain people saps my energy. I like my own company. But I like people too. It's a delicate balance.