It Hurts So Much

I come to find that my marriage was a complete lie for 20 years. I suspected things were not right from the beginning and I tried to salvage by seeking counseling but my wife stated nothing was wrong. I trusted her.....but now I come to find that from the start it was all a lie. Now 3 kids and 20 years later its all over. As I type this message I hear my family in the kitchen enjoying family dinners without me. I wasn't the one who cheated. I was faithful even at the point when we separated. I remained celibate even now. It hurts and its driving me nuts. And all I want now is for my wife to come clean. I'm not angry with her....but I'm hurting because she won't come clean. I understand now that my wife has psycological issues that she needs to address thereby I'm not angry. But need for her to come clean so I can know how long the lie lasted.
ebDivorce ebDivorce
41-45, M
May 21, 2012