Damn Your Sexy!

Many many times. Several times a week sometimes several times a day someone tells me how sexy i am and how they wish i could be thiers! My exes still call me, strangers try to talk to me all the time, men at work, yet my husband is not attracted to me at all. i know sometimes when someone sees you too much it gets stale supposedly, the excitement fades, but my parents still flirt, still squeeze each other and their in their 60's. What the hell is wrong with our relationship and we are not even 30 yet. It ******* sucks. If i would have known marraige would have been like this i would have ran for the hills.

goldie25 goldie25
31-35, F
8 Responses Mar 4, 2009

you can talk it out or go to marriage counseling or seperate that is about all!

i agree journeyman, life is way too short to be miserable.

thanks secret.

Truly, I don't know that there is an easy answer for any kind of complex problem (have you seen the "answers" the government has had for the economy lately???).<br />
In your case, I think it's imperative that the two of you speak about this problem immediatley. You need to tell him how you're feeling - too often women exect their men to somehow read their minds.<br />
Spill your guts and see what he says. Good luck.

see here is the FREAKING PROBLEM!!!! we dont even have kids and we are having this problem. we are acting like a freaking old married couple and there are no kids. how the hell am i going to have kids if i cant even get him to touch me. or if he touches me its like a squeeze and a pinch here and there but then thats it. its like he is ******* teasing me. he is too lazy to do the whole job. but he can lay there and get head. if he is hard on his own i might get some if he is not hard though there is no getting it hard and making a whole time of it. its like fourplay is foreign to him. i really dont know what happened. its killing me. i really dont know how much hope i have left. if someone has an answer please share because i am freaking clueless and really about to lose it!

I hate to say it but patience may be the answer. I don't think most men, myself included, grow up until after 30. Many can be shallow self centered jerks. I know it took me a while to gain a little understanding of women and to fully take joy in their complexities. As long as he treats you with respect and care. <br />
If he's not "taking care of business" like he should maybe you can set aside some time each week just for each other. It can be tough with work, kids,everything we have going on in our lives to also keep that flame going. Maybe if you can pick a night each week that, after the kids are in bed, you skip TV or whatever and just go lock that bedroom door behind you?

i know. i wish i knew the answers though. if there was a clear answer to how i could spice it up i would try it. but i dont think there is an answer like that. i think the person just has to see you as such a catch that no matter how you look, cold in the corner of your eye, drool on your check you are still a catch. this seems so much easier for women. we can still love our men, beer bellies and all but let a woman get a scretch mark, she is tainted and sour goods!

I think this is why successful married couples talk about the hard work they put in to make their marriages work. After all, it's hard to be all hot for someone after you've seen them without make-up, etc., for 1,000+ mornings.