I Feel Like I Am Screaming Out Loud.....my Life Is Hell !

Let me see....since all of this has 'HIT' in the past few weeks, let me just lay it out:

My parents own a house my husband & I have made payments on for 12 years ~ we couldn't get a  loan, so they are selling 'out from under us'. I am heart-broken. We have spent a great deal on this house & remodeled it all ! I am just SURE they will not give us ANY money when they sell it !  So, we will have to move. This big decision came after I talked with them about NOT pushing their political & religious views on us CONSTANTLY !

My husband & I have been 'going through a rough time' in our relationship. I am NOT happy, but I have been trying to be due to the fact we have a daughter who is 19 & I love with all my heart.

My best friend's son has been causing her INCREDIBLE stress & getting into trouble, yelling at her & in trouble with the law. It is NOT good since she has Congestive Heart failure & cannot take this stress.

Since recently leaving a very 'controlling' church, I essentially lost MOST of my circle of friends.

My other best friend died of Colon cancer 2 years ago. She was someone I could 'lean on' and I did the same for her.

My 4 year-old niece just got diagnosed with Leukemia and is going through Chemo treatments & Hellish testing & pain.

My hubby got a DUI a few weeks ago. He was in a company car & so to COMPOUND it all....he got FIRED ! Yeah !

I have MS, Fibomyalgia & various other health problems. I am VERY depressed & trying NOT to fall-apart under the stress. I take a huge amount of medications to keep my problems at arm's length away from me (pain from Fibromyalgia is about a 8 out of 10 EVERY DAY)

We are BROKE and I am so stressed that I am falling apart....a piece at a time.

Normally I am the person who does things for other people. I am selfless, generous & kind. I feel like I am just treading water and barely keeping my head above water. I need to for my daughter's sake. I want to run away & hide, but I have nowhere to run.....
notvisable notvisable
36-40, F
21 Responses Sep 12, 2011

Hugs for you today and prayers each and every day.

everybody have their own problems..don't involve yourself<br />
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dont be selfish owning all the problems ur environment has...

My Mother passed at 92 a year ago, but she always told me in times or trouble "this too, will pass."

Wow... I wish I can just hug U. I too am struggling w/ my church, but my faith will never waiver. I will say a prayer for you. Stay blessed.

Oh dear! You are going through hard times. From your story, I can see, that you are strong person, and probably it is not the first time you go through rought times. My best wishes of luck to you. I wish that everything will be solved the way you wanted it to be. <br />
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I would like to share some information with you, it might help. Fibro gets more agressive under stress, and it does not make situation easier. I have a girlfriend with fibro, we have tried a lot of different natural food sumplements to ease the pain and found one that helps: turmeric. <br />
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Turmeric has many benefits, but one of them : It is a potent natural anti-inflammatory that works as well as many anti-inflammatory drugs but without the side effects, Is a natural painkiller and cox-2 inhibitor. You can read more on the internet. My friend was taking the maximum dose and she could feel results already after one week. <br />
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Good luck!

I "lost" my house today.....I'm heart broken. My parents owned it & sold it today. I have lived here 12 years & there is so much Blood, sweat, tears,memories & money of mine here.....I'm just 'broken'.....:(

I feel sad for you

I am so sorry.

so sorry

One of my best friends on ep is in the exact same boat as you. She struggles with it everyday like you do. She is a very giving and caring person, much the way you sound. I hope you find peace and start feeling better.

It is real simple dear, take baby steps, and finish thngs off in the smallest order until you get to the hardest one, and then clobbeer it, You will feel great. Hugs

I know what church you're talking about. I left it too. It is easier if you are up front with the people that you aren't interested just don't tell them all the details (like their dogma is pretty much insane and no you won't give money to buy shopping malls). I'm sure the future is bright for a beautiful and intelligent woman like you. This too shall pass.................

i hope all goes well for you if you were near me i would let you take out some aggression out on me

Oh! I forgot Scream loud and long! blow off steam;it helps!

i'm going to pray for you! now ! just as soon as i share a little secret!<br />
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It is the law of attraction: What we fear most is whats always on our mind and it attracts all the other things we fear! You have to find a way to create a very strong positive emotion. Love and sex being the easiest and fastest! That's my pennies worth!<br />
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try put all the trouble aside! for a short period! With love

I cannot tell you enough how much ALL of your comments mean to me. I have very few (true) friends and I NEED to talk through things & TELL SOMEONE about the events that are stressing me out & making my life crazy ! Thanks for letting me VENT & "just say it OUT LOUD'......I know MANY people have 'baggage in their lives' & I FEEL for them. <br />
♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆ ♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆ ♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆ ♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆♥☆ <br />
Thank you ♥☆♥☆Thank you ♥☆♥☆Thank you ♥☆♥☆Thank you ♥☆♥☆Thank you ♥☆♥☆<br />
<br />
♥Suzy ♥

So sorry to hear all of the stress. I wish there was something I could do. I can't stand to see a good looking woman with tears. If I wasn't broke myself I would do whatever was in my power. Best of wishes, and hang in there.

Darling I just wish I could breastfeed your hart and brain


Suzy: You're doing some good things. - You've identified stuff in your past; in the list you shared here they are things that have negatively affected you. I encourage you (if you haven't already) to prepare a list of those things that you are thankful for, or that you are attracted to, or that inspire you. You get the idea. - You've rejected elements trying to make you somebody you don't want to be. You've rejected the social political views of your parents. You've rejected the controlling views of your former church. I'm going out on a limb that the current economic crises (there's more than one now) and the recent national health care debate as possible factors that may have partly influenced you. - I depart from a previous commenter. You may choose a church at some later time, but I don't think you need a "shepherd" at this time. You need support that may come from others in similar situations as you, or may be public types of support. With a 19 year old daughter your domestic situation, your family situation, is at a crossroads. It sounds like you are already evaluating your marriage (not that I'm encouraging this, but you're the one that knows your situation intimately).<br />
Anyways, don't count yourself out. Reflect on what you can learn from all that's happened... identify what you can influence, shake off and accept the rest, and forge your path to your future.<br />
More power to you. You sound like a strong woman and only getting stronger.<br />

sorry to hear this. That's quite a list of health and stress issues to deal with. Hang in there!

Oh, honey. I understand. :-(

Normally I always have something witty and often helpful to say to anyone.<br />
I really am not sure what I should tell you.<br />
<br />
So I'll make a wish for you.<br />
I sincerely hope that smiles will manage to find their way to your face and that you may find solace.<br />
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Stranger or not,<br />
Warm hugs to you. <3

Thank you so much. I am grateful for your warm hug &amp; your compassion. Thanks ! hugs,