Dreaming With A Broken Heart.

I was 17 and she was 16. She was all I had ever wanted. She was beautiful she was lovely. Her voice was so sweet. Her eyes were so expressive. She said she loved me. she said she loved me. I said I couldn't believe her. She said no one ever does. I said you've never given me a reason to. She began to cry and I watched. when our conversation reached its end her tears continued as she stood at her her class rooms door, staring back at me, i was moving, I didn't want to leave. But she put me through hell she wanted to be with me and then she didn't she wanted to be with other people people she didn't care as much about as she would say. she stood in the door way I spoke " I think I love you." And my heart began to break. We had many more conversations like this shed cry and I'd give in and walk away wondering was this real, this feels like a nightmare, she had the letters that I wrote her, my heart and soul because I loved her. I loved her. She was all that I had ever wanted. But I was nothing to her, I was just another heart she broke. A game she played.

Wakeing up hurts so much. Knowing she's not mine. Knowing she's not next to me. I feel the tightness in my chest. Because I know she's gone for the rest of my life. She'll never be mine again. I'll never feel her next to me again. We can't be friends, speaking to her kills me hearing her voice destroys me. I remember saying "so this is goodbye yeah?" with a chuckle humor had always been my strong suite. She smiled a sad smile one that mirrored my own "yeah." she spoke "I want to hug you but you said I make you feel things." for what I thought was our last hug I pulled her by the small of the back , her waist pressed into mine her torso against mine her head on my shoulder and we stood like that for some time. I pulled back but we stayed connected at the hips I smiled sadly we looked into each others eyes and then we fully disconnected. She went to go smoke a cigarette and I went down stairs and felt empty inside. She hurt me and untill the very last day I was good to her.

And that was it. She went to some guy who made her happier than I could. Im still dreaming with a broken heart.

AllisonRue AllisonRue
May 5, 2012