Empowering.I couldn't sleep. I couldn't eat. And I couldn't stop thinking.
For one perfect month , I was on top of the world - dating an amazing guy who couldn't stop raving about me and about to embark on the most exhilarating and exciting career move I could dream of. And then - poof! It all went up in smoke. My house of cards came crashing down. My boyfriend disappeared on me and returned briefly only to say that 'this relationship was like a shoe that didn't fit' (what 31 year old compares his first ever relationship to a shoe??? A shoe???) and could we please go back to being just friends (I politely declined the offer)? The career move didn't materialize and I found myself suddenly unemployed and searching for work in a frozen job market.
And depressed as hell.
So one night, when I couldn't sleep, on an impulse, I crept out of bed, opened the closet and took out an unfinished knitting project that I'd started 3 years ago. And started knitting. And stopped only when I'd finished it.
And then started another - a more complicated pattern. Finished it and gifted it to my favorite high school teacher. And then started on two more.
And every time I finish one, I feel like I'm slowly taking back a piece of my life - the way I want it to be. After years of starting knitting projects and abandoning them , finishing one after another feels oddly empowering! Like my life might be in a place I never planned for but I know I'll be okay. It'll get back on track eventually - like a close buddy of mine likes to say - It's good. S'all good!
rarewitch 26-30, F 1 Response 2 Jan 21, 2013