i have tried to stay friends with the males in my life but they are all going crazy on me.since i took my wedding ring off and are now single they have changed on me.they yell at me and worry over nothing.they know we are nothing more then friends.i hardly see them just the ocassional phone call usually because they need advice or are upset in their life. i do not need males yelling at me i got rid of that in my life why would i need more of that. its sad but i am no longer friends with them. i was there life line but they are bringing me down.jealousy and stupidity ruins everything. i was becoming close with one of my friends he is seperated like me. we have a connection so much in common.he knows how to treat a lady and is so caring.we had a long chat about no more relationships for a long while nothing serious.he brought it up first and i fully agreed.we were having so much fun together. i do not know what happened it happened so fast one minute we were two happy friends carefree when together the next he got jealous over nothing.the story of my life.i did not even realise he was jealous at the time.he made it so clear about friends.he did started complimenting me but i thought he was just being sweet.getting me to feel good about myself. he likes me so much he is scared to contact me know he messaged me saying its too soon.i said too soon for friends. i am stupid i never twigged he has fallen for me.he loves me.i thought i felt nothing for him but i really miss our friendship.no strings attatched so comfortable around each other i could tell him anything.i tryed messaging him he is staying away from me.i know he is torn and confused.i am angry at myself and him.pushing me away like that.we were good friends at least i feel i deserve one message one call.love, jealousy and seperation just cause problems. he has two kids he is going to concentrate on and i understand that but i deserve respect.one message would be nice.in his message he said we will not see each other for a while what ever that means.i feel its a brush off.i am being dumped and we are just friends.even though we are just friends it hurts me so.i miss him.we did not talk or see each other much even though he does not live far but it started being once a week call i looked forward to. i am worried i will hear nothing this week.i want to sit and talk with him even if it is just for one last time.did our friendship mean so little.he gets feelings and throws me away like rubbish.i have never had the connection i have with him with anyone.i miss my friend. i need to here his voice one more time.i know he loves me. since he loves me so is he just going to hide from me forget about me. i feel like garbage.like he has had his fun when he needed me and has now thrown me away.i guess from now on i will be watching my dvds on my own tv by myself their will be no jealousy that way.

freeangel freeangel
31-35, F
1 Response Apr 11, 2010

I can so feel your pain with this. Argh.