The Teen Girl Suicide Story

The world was too much for Lydia. She'd had enough. She couldn't take her mother anymore, or her father or anything else. She was going to kill herself; and she was going to do it dramatically, by god.

She was set on it.

One day, when both of her parents were gone from the house for one reason or another,---Lydia no longer cared where they went, or why---she pried apart one of her mother's razors (you know, the cheap kind with only one blade) and withdrew the glinting blade from it. She smiled at the sliver of metal in her hand.

She was ready.

She ran some bath water, letting the tub fill slowly as she sat at the edge of it and thought, twirling the lethal bit of metal in her hand. She dropped it twice in the floor and both times scrambled to find it. Her mother would kill her if she destroyed all of her razors because she kept losing the blades out of them.

Have to get in the right frame of mind for this, she contemplated. Testing the water and finding it agreeable, she ******** off her clothes and climbed inside. She mulled over why she should die. Let's see, I'm fifteen, I'm unwanted...uh...I'm ugly? No, I'm not ugly...but maybe I should tell myself that I am. Yeah, I'm ugly, and...um...God hates me. Yeah, that's it. No, wait! There is no God. That works better.

She laughed to herself. Yeah, today was a good day to die.

After she soaked for a few moments, she lifted the razor and held it out in front of her dramatically. She lowered it to her wrist, letting all the suicidal thoughts flow through her mind like she was supposed to.

Wait, she interrupts herself, I really should bathe first. I really don't smell all that good. She resolved to wash before she continued. She didn't want the person who found her to notice her uncleanliness. She wanted them to focus on the fact she was dead, not the fact that she stank.

After she was satisfied with herself, she looked around her for the razor.

She couldn't find it. She sighed and felt underneath her for it. She came up with nothing.


Ah, whatever, she fumed. I'll just do it later. I'm kind of hungry, anyway.

She climbed out of the bath and wrapped a towel around her dripping body. Once she was fully dressed, she went downstairs and dug through the refrigerator for something to answer to the grumbling in her stomach. She found a half-empty box of pizza buried at the bottom of the fridge and pulled three pieces. She warmed them up in the microwave and sat with them on the couch once they were at just the right tempurature.

She was on her last piece and had pizza sauce and grease all over her face when her parents came home.

"Oh, hey Mom," Lydia said, taking in a mouthful of pizza. She swallowed forcefully, the last bit of cheap, greasy pizza sliding down her throat.

"Hey, Lydia," said her mother. She was in the middle of taking off her jacket when she stopped. "You want to come with me to your grandmother's today? We're supposed to help her haul some things to the dump. I just remembered" She waited there in front of the door, her jacket half off of her.

"Aaw, I can't," said Lydia. "There's something I was supposed to do today."

"What?"

"I don't remember."
SoManyInsecurities SoManyInsecurities
18-21, F
Jan 11, 2013