My Cousin Was 19

My cousin was 19, and a few days from his 20th birthday.  He had a serious marijuana addiction, because he had been smoking regularly from such a young age - 12 or 13.  He had recently been to a rehab centre and started taking anti-depressants, and started to (with some reluctance) face his problems - I think they just seemed to hard for him to face.

I just feel that we all ran out of time with him.  He just couldn't get through this dark time, but if he had, I really think things would have been ok for him - there was a  lot of potential there.  So to me it seems like really tragic timing.

I didn't know him well, but I know the rest of the family well, and of course the ripples will always be felt.

RIP Sammy, I hope you're in a better place now dude.


GoldenArrow GoldenArrow
31-35, M
2 Responses Feb 12, 2009

Yes, I've heard about that, but I tend to think that anti-depressants get blamed a lot for deaths where the person would be suicidal regardless.<br />
In Sam's case, we suspect that the problem was that he was in a real danger period . I suspect was becoming aware of his actual situation - by coming out of the marijuana haze and by the anti-depressants lifting his deep depression - to actually feel a little *less* numb, and so feeling more emotional pain and more sense of motivation to change his situation.<br />
Unfortunately he hadn't yet got the skills to know *what* he could himself do to lift himself out of situation, so he took that decisive action - but what he did was irreversible. <br />
But of course, no one will ever really know what he was thinking in those last moments.

I'm sorry to hear about your cousin, I know how difficult it is to deal with the aftermath of a suicide.<br />
It is unfortunate, but suicide and suicide ideation are frequent side effects of anti-depressant medications that no one talks about. Doctors hand out prescriptions for these drugs like they are candy, but they don't take the time to monitor how patients are reacting to them.