The Foundations.

In order for a relationship to succeed, there need to be four major components in it. You need to be connected on an emotional level, a physical level, an intellectual level, and a spiritual level. If there are conflict in any of these areas, it will affect your relationship.

Emotional level: I have seen how a relationship can truly falter if you do not have that emotional connection. You come home, you share your hardships, or seek advice, and the person responds with, "I don't know." or listens, but walks away saying nothing. It's great they took the time to listen to you and cared for you, but an emotinal connection is more than that. Someone taking the time to help you figure out the problem at hand. Looking deeper at the issue with you, but still allowing you to solve it on your own. But also talking through it. The person may not know, but they don't just stop there, they ask questions to perhaps help you get there.

Physical level: I have also seen the faltering of a relationship because of this. You have to be phsyically compatible with your partner. And if an issue of intimacy comes up, it needs to be talked about. You can't just bottle it up and ignore. THAT WILL NOT FIX THE PROBLEM! You have to talk about it with each other. But you have to be comfortable enough with one another too. But to share your dreams, to be open enough to share your fantasies, and to be open enough to experiment with one another. It's about each other in the bedroom. It's not just about one person. It's about pleasuring both. And making sure each other's needs are being met int he bedroom. You're in it together.

Intellectual level: I've seen this happen from outside experience. I've heard people vent about this to me too. If you're not on the same intellectual level as your partner, it will eventually get to you. In the beginning, you may not notice it's impact because your'e so accommodating to the partner, but years later, after being together, it will come into play. When the conversations run out, when you look at your partner, and all you see are struggles you will notice that difference in the intellectual level and it will DRIVE you up the wall. You have to be able to relate to each other. You don't have to UNDERSTAND everything, but then you have the ability to ask the questions that will get your partner thinking int hat direction, and for you to understand where they're coming from. You challenge each other this way too by asking t hose type of questions. You're there to truly push each other at times. You really are.

And then the spiritual level. This is important. It really is. Understanding how important a person is spiritually. If someone gets together who is not nearly on the same level as that. It will create a divide because the other person can not relate. I am not saying they have to be the same religion, but I am saying they need to recognize the importance and level of spirituality each individual is at. This one i struggle with a little more because I am a spiritual person, but I've lost touch with that side of myself for the longest of times, but I still know it's truly important in a relationship.
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1 Response Jul 19, 2010

beautiful so very true .... ^_^ great reminder thank you demitri xx