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Learning Is Not The Same As Doing

Letting go is something we all have to do at some point in our lives. Most people have trouble doing it. Whether it is something materialistic, people, deaths, change or pets. Some people say letting go is the same thing as acceptance, but that's a lie. Letting go isnt moving on, letting go is forgetting something to ease the pain. In a way, I dont want the pain to go away. If the pain does go away, what will remind me of the loss that effected my life? The people that I lost, the ones that have changed, and what I had to mentally deal with when going through it all. How can you let go of that? People wonder why I get angry when they tell me "you just have to move on", but that's it. How do you just move on without thinking about the feelings or anything inbetween? Many say you end up stronger if you let it go and move on. IT? These were people who made huge impacts on your lives how can you just let them go? How can you let go when this person or people were apart of yourself? Now you are only a fraction of what you use to be. How do you deal with that? How do you  It has taken me over years to let go but it's still hard. I cant just let them go and move on, its like i need to keep pieces of them. How do I act as if they havent existed? Have I accepted their deaths? yes. Have I accepted that they arent coming back? yes. Will I ever let them go? Never! Will the pain ever get easier for me? Has the pain lessened? Yes over the years it has. Sometimes i just want to be numb and not feel the pain ever. I'm healing; that doesnt mean that I am forgetting them. It just means that I am learning to live without them, despite the pain I feel. I just dont ever want to let them go. 
missyounike23 missyounike23 18-21, F Jun 16, 2010

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