Hypocritical Of Me, But Yeah...

I honestly find beauty in all shapes and sizes. But for some reason I can't extend that body love to myself. I'm overweight due to a disorder I have (PCOS) and though I eat extremely healthy and work out daily, I can not lose weight.

It's been pretty hard to deal with rude comments and harsh judgments being made about me based solely on my weight, even though the offending parties have no idea that my weight is not caused by me being lazy or gluttonous, etc. All they know is: FAT = LAZY PIG.

I have allowed my insecurities about my weight hold me back from quite a lot of activities and social gatherings- I even avoid being an extrovert because of my weight. I feel like a hypocrite every time I tell someone to believe in their own beauty no matter what others say. But it's something I struggle with and am working hard to overcome.

Maybe someday.

SpiritOfTheRabbit SpiritOfTheRabbit
36-40, F
2 Responses Mar 7, 2010

Although I dont have an disorder I feel exactly the same way. I tell my friends to believe in there selfs and always be confident then I go back and dont do the sa.e wirth my self.

Update:<br />
I have decided that I cannot surround myself with negativity and expect to be ok. I have deleted all negative experiences from my profile (though the stories still remain) and I am only allowing myself to speak kindly to my inner self, and rise above the negative aspects of my past. It is working already. I feel better than I ever have because now I love myself. I hope that all of you who feel the way I used to feel find your happiness as well.<br />