Lost, Confused And Just Need Help

I am in a D/s relationship for the first time. He is a great guy and a patient teacher, but sometimes I just don't get it.... I can mess up the greatest day by saying one thing wrong. Does anyone have any basic, must follow tips for being a submissive? We don't live together and see each other about once a week. I am truly looking for someone who I can be friends with and just talk to. My friends don't understand.
ladybug5732 ladybug5732
5 Responses Dec 7, 2012

Well, people do mess up from time to time. I can't say anymore because you don't give much detail. Send me a message.

Thank you! I am hoping to find some great friends on here who understand and we can help each other. This type of lifestyle is not always easy, but I love being in it with Him.

My mouth gets me in trouble a lot. I'm not good at judging when to keep it shut. I'll get upset about something then the smart mouth comes out. He is very good about letting me know when I'm doing things right. I don't get punished much, but he does get frustrated because I keep repeating the same mistakes like my attitude and mouth. It's just hard sometimes because I have no one to ask.

Good thing to remember before speaking- is it positive? Uplifting? Will it improve the situation or hinder it? It's just maturity, my dear. If you want to improve, you will. That's the biggest part of the battle.

aquiet1 makes a very important point, ladybug. Your Dom's responsibility isn't to set goals and standards and expectations and then to sit back and watch you repeatedly fail and then punish you for those failures... He needs to be guiding you, encouraging you, and reinforcing your progress. So, assuming that is what He has been doing, what are you doing that ruins your day, hon?

There are a lot of us here that can help. What are some things that mess up the day? Also, a D's job is to make you a better person. So if he doesn't help you overcome some of these things, he'd be doing you a disservice.