The Ever Growing Web of Lies

I hate myself for lying, I do it every day I worry that it's got so bad that I no longer know what is the truth and where I've lied. I've lied to my parents, to my friends, to people I have loved and I just don't have an answer to stop myself from doing it. I can't stand what I've become - a completely debt ridden liar that can't bear the truth.

I find myself lying as routine, which sounds stupid but I can't help myself from doing it and I've even lied recently to get a new job. I don't know how to make it stop and I don't know if I can. I hate myself and the things that I have done to people, I can't let anyone get close because I don't think they'd like me anymore...

I guess the problem is when you base any part of your life on lies then you can't expect it to turn out well and that you should expect the worst. I owe over twice my salary in debt, I feel awful all the time because I drink to hide my unhappiness and I don't feel that I can talk to anyone about things because I'm worried what they would think = think that's the most truth I've managed in a long time.

plcorg plcorg
36-40, M
1 Response Mar 15, 2009

it's like you are talking about me to<br />
i have lost the LOVE of my life because of lying