The Healing Power of Solitude

as a young person i was unable to be alone for any length of time.  i felt the need to be surrounded by people every waking moment.  it made no difference who they were or if i knew them, i simply needed to be around people.

it was also during this time in my life that i was never without a boyfriend.  it's as if i would come up single suddenly and go to the next guy on the 'list' ... *sighs*

what an unhealthy lifestyle, eh?

this all ended upon a very tragic breakup.  it was then i refused to so much as date anyone.  i didn't want to be around anyone either.  no doubt i went through a major depression during this time.  i definitely needed to be alone to 'lick my wounds.' 

the most intriguing thing happened while i was alone for the first time in my life.  i began to reflect on my life, my thoughts, my attitude, my personality, my career, my decisions and my actions.  i recognized many things about myself i had not been aware of.  some of which were positive and some of which were not necessarily.  i began to construct a plan of action to change these things.

as time went on not only did i change for the better, but i also came to know who i was and who i'd become as well as what i wanted and did not want from life.  for the very first time in my life i recognized the person in the mirror and i actually admired her.  she was no longer just a pretty face.  there was so much more to her.

solitude is a sweet gift.  it's not something we often find ourselves indulging in these days.  i can only assume people would rather not grapple with their own demons and this is why.  for me, however, i find a healing power when i'm alone.  i'm able to ascend from the pits of h3ll when i am left to my own devices. 

i wish more people were able to recognize the positivity of solitude.  surely we'd be a much more 'complete' people.  and perhaps there'd be much less 'problems' in this life if people would take the time to reflect and be HONEST with themselves...

AbbyNormal AbbyNormal
31-35, F
2 Responses Jun 28, 2007

even while in a relationship, and sometimes even more so, it's important to make time for yourself. DEFINITELY! it's during this time to yourself you're able to access what's happening in your life, your relationship, etc. and how to react to these things. you're right about it being a want/need - social interaction. however, as i've grown older i find myself needing very little, if any, social interaction. i literally have to force myself into social situations. a complete 180 from how i once was. go figure! perhaps i'll find the happy medium one day ...

I really liked your story and I relate to many of the themes in it. <br />
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First off, I am definitely someone who hates to be alone. I haven't always been in relationships, but I feel a strong need to always be surrounded by people and near buzz, chatter, and interaction. Part of this I think is a natural human need for companionship, friendship, and social interaction, but like you pointed out I think there is also a lot of value in solitude and the opportunity to reflect. Now that I am in a relationship for the first time, I'm trying to still prioritize and carve out solitary time to make sure I have time to reflect.