... Because That's Who I Am

I had a lot of difficulty coming out of the closet. My cousin came out years before me, when she was abut 13-14, and I was 16, and the reaction she got was quite shocked and quite negative. Already feeling terrified and ashamed of how my own sexuality was turning out, I vowed to never come out. I didn't want to disappoint and upset my family. I was almost 21 before it got to me. What finally made me come out was that I developed a huge crush on this girl, and I just had to take a chance. It was killing me not to. At that point my family had calmed down a lot with my cousin's decision too and that gave me a little more strength, plus I had my cousin for support. It was such a weight lifted off my shoulders and chest, like I suddenly grew a pair of wings. The reaction I got was MUCH better than the reaction my cousin received, and that also helped give me strength. My cousin hated being gay, she would have chosen to be straight if she could have, but I'm actually the exact opposite. Now that I'm out, I would NEVER want to go back in. I have the most amazing girlfriend in the world who I would never trade for anything, and life is just so much nicer being able to be myself and be honest about how I feel. I love my girlfriend, and while everything in my life isn't entirely peachy, being gay is definitely one thing that I would never ever choose to change about myself.
GlitterFlame89 GlitterFlame89
22-25, F
1 Response May 20, 2012

that's great that your happy wish you and your girlfriend all the best feel sorry for your cousin i hope she finds happiness as well

Thank you so much! Unfortunately, my cousin passed away 9/17/2010 : ( She had a lot of issues besides this one, and I sincerely hope she is in a happier place now.

oh i'm so sorry i believe she is happier place now you are so welcome have a wonderful day