Male Chastity, a Womens Perspective

Hello folks,

I've been confined in a cb 2000 for sometime now and wish to share an article my wife wrote on another site not to long ago. It pretty much sums up hers and my journey wrt male chastity.  Feedback is always welcome.

My husband started a few years ago testing the waters about locking up his penis. At first I thought this was totally absurd and I remember having a feeling inside of me thinking “my God, he’s a pervert” Why on earth would any male what to have his most valued possession locked away? I didn’t know what to think. So before I tell my story I want to totally re-assure all potential key holders (KH) that there is nothing insane or obscure with male chastity. You are definitely not alone. Male chastity device sales have sky rocketed over the past 8 years, all due credit to the internet where one can order discreetly and from a wide variety of choice and style. Why has this flourished you may ask? Because men truly desire someone to control their sexual urges and desires. And if you control a man’s penis, you control the man and he now will focus on you, his KH and in return, he hopes he will receive some form of gratification. In fact I can pretty much guarantee that once YOU take control of your significant others pride and joy, you will both be closer, happier and most of all, you will see a person who will do anything for his KH, who might allow him some form of attention.  Make no mistake about it, males are penis driven. Yes they love you, care for you, provide and will always protect you but they are purpose driven and what drives them is their penis. There’s nothing you can do with that God given trait but you can harness it. So why wouldn’t you? Have you even remotely noticed a man’s behaviour after he has climaxed? Unmotivated and selfish are the two terms that pop into my head. Denying and controlling a man’s sexual urges will greatly benefit you, the KH If you feel intrigued in any way by male chastity, then these next few lines may well help you on your way. Don’tever feel guilty and don’t ever feel pressured. He asked for it and you (assuming you’ve read this far) will implement it. So rather than bore you with the beginnings of our journey, I will start midway, about two years ago and the routine we currently have. You must believe me that male chastity will enhance everything in your relationship providing you both do your part. In fact the easy part is getting the device secured to his penis. His challenges at the onset of chastity will most definitely include these, amongst other things; -sexual frustration (poor guy) -Learning about your needs and putting you first -the realization that you now control his pleasure These will be very difficult for most men BUT once again you must trust me, keeping him locked up will significantly reduce the time for him to get with the program. He wants some form of attention (penis related obviously) and he just may well receive it, if you think he should. The work for you is somewhat more challenging, not difficult. You need to get creative. It’s not just a matter of locking on the device and presto, “man maid”. Oh no. We have to be relentless and creative ladies. It’s that creativity that will wrap that big man around your little finger. And the more you get comfortable with his chastity the more creative you will become. There are a ton of resources available on the internet. Books, discussion groups, blogs and just simple people like me who willing share our experience. And by all means, ask him to share his fantasies which will help you define the direction you both will take on this journey. A KH creativeness  includes but is not limited to the following; -          Total control of his penis. You decide how long the chastity device stays in place and when it is removed. DO NOT be swayed by his whimpering. That behaviour should only lead to more time being locked away. -          Place your needs first and don’t feel guilty about doing so. If he is interested in getting gratification, your needs will be met. -          Tease and deny him endlessly. This is where creativity comes in and I will suggest a few of my favourites later on. -          Never leave him un-supervised with the chastity device removed. NEVER. If you choose to have him without the device for whatever reason, it MUST be placed back on him immediately after you’re finished. -          And mostly, you need to enjoy your role in all of this. This is probably the most important factor because a sincere desire from you will only enhance the connection and mind set of both of you. Get into the role and you will greatly benefit. My husband has worked for the police force for the past 33 years and sometimes, that cop attitude would spill over into our married life. That was up until two years ago. Chastity has significantly reduced many such unwarranted behaviours and he is truly so much more content. His priority when he gets home is me. NOTE: it took him three weeks to figure that one out <grin> My choice of locking devices has varied over the past few years but I am now very content with my most recent choice. Without advertizing the company name, I will tell you that this device is the most secure available. There is absolutely no means of self gratification what so ever and with the lock being placed behind him, the belt lock is impossible to pick or remove without assistance. Hygiene is very important and close monitoring and proper lubrication  will prevent chaffing of the skin.  Monitor him closely for signs of cheating or attempts of product removal. If you are just starting, I would suggest one of the CB series 2000, 3000, 6000. They are affordable, very easy to apply and easily cleaned while worn. Experimenting with the rings and spaces will ensure a comfortable and secure fit. A Prince Albert or frenulum piercing is suggested for added security. How long before he gets to release. This becomes a personal choice. For starters, no earlier than two to three weeks. Hubby went 32 days before his first release. You will start seeing a different man in a very short time frame. Use this break in time to focus on your needs and wants. Define how you see this journey, learn to read your man. He may well have had a bad day and needs comfort. This is after all, about growing within the relationship and the road is a two way street. It is also important to keep the plumbing in working order, so to speak. It is recommended that the plumbing be allowed to clear no less than twice per month. This keeps his seminal track in a healthy state. Some KH will take and stretch that number and time frame based on their own merit system. But not is all lost ladies! Who said the “pipe cleaning” had to be an enjoyable experience? Hubby is focus driven from the tease and denial, not the ******. I rarely allow pleasurable *******, other than special occasions. There are several ways to expel without any form of pleasure. Stop the stroking as he reaches his climax....this is very effective at ***** removal and does not allow him any pleasure. Have him hump something that doesn’t offer pleasurable results and stop the humping just as he is about to ***. I have implemented prostate milking as a monthly routine and would highly recommend you researching this procedure. I know of a KH who’s husband may only  ****** from wet dreams. I tease my husband constantly and to be truthful, it is not a chore. I enjoy wearing revealing clothing when we’re alone, something that enhances my cleavage, the key on a ankle bracelet or the key hanging from my neck in between my breasts, maybe shorts that are just a tad too short, heels and stockings, words that tantalize him, lightly touching myself while we’re cuddled on the sofa. I love suggesting that maybe, just maybe there might be something in store for him. I’ll tell him of how nice it will be once I remove the device. Tease him with your hands, bringing him to the edge and then lock him away. I’ll allow hubby to use his mouth on me and I do not hide the fact that I am enjoying this pleasure while he is caged. Talk directly to his chastised penis, whisper in his ear, use your nails to lightly scratch along his body. Remember  “don’t feel guilty” . None of this is cruel, this is not punishing him. View it as rewarding him because in his mind, that’s exactly what you doing. Now this may seem like a lot of work but trust me my dear lass’s, you will receive tenfold. For every notion you exhibit he will be driven to find that treasure that you hold, so he can receive more of what you have given. The return for him will be doing the best he can to ensure your every need is met. Pampering baths where I am gently washed. Massages that end when I want them to. Lingerie, perfumes, quiet time, together time, anything I want. Because I hold the key. And in time, the blend between both of you will be like everything you wanted in a man. I keep my husband locked  24/7 and I don’t put too much thought into how long he has been locked or how long since his last release. Why should I? Trust me, he’s already got that part covered, more than you or I could imagine. And importantly, I don’t warn him of extended time in restraint if he does fall short of my expectations. I simply enforce strict chastity and let him figure it out. The facts of male chastity in my loving relationship are; -he is so attentive and loving. The true man I knew I married. -I am treated as a queen and he is my best friend. We share everything and he is very content -Love making is passionate and meaningful (when I allow it) Finally, I would love to connect with likeminded women KH and encourage you to contact me at anytime at so we can share and exchange stories. I’m always willing to learn more and raise the bar when it comes to chastity. Enjoy the process ladies, it will be well worth your efforts. Trust me.   He did ask for this and it’s wonderful. I love him so


Ivanduce Ivanduce
51-55, M
19 Responses Jan 20, 2009

I much appreciate this thread and the sharing of experiences with male chastity. I am very much in love with my wife of over 35 years. During that time we have experienced many wonderful and erotic times together. Recently, however, our sexual relations have diminished, something that does concern us both. Over the years I have often fantasized about being locked up by her for whatever length of time she may choose, , the key in her possession, her control clear and unambiguous, my devotion given willingly. But i have hidden my desires, fearful of rejection. Common enough i guess. But the time is now. i want her to know of my desires. To have her snap the lock shut. For her to know that i am prepared to beg for this and to thank her. And for her to come to appreciate this for herself and for us together. i know that i want this, to be locked for, to be explicitly under her control, for her to set the terms, and for this to be a source of intimacy and connection between us. i expect that if she agrees to this both she and i will experience changes as this becomes a new and shared reality between us. Parts of that will be difficult, parts very rewarding. In a couple of weeks we will be traveling to another country for a vacation and during that time i will share my desires and hope that she will be both accepting and enticed. Wish me luck. If it goes well i will shortly be shopping for a chastity device that I will have shipped to her and when it arrives it will bring a smile to her face and a moment of truth for me.

Here is wishing you luck, Susan, and I will keep my fingers crossed for you!

I love being locked up too, but need to take it off every couple days to wash and stay clean. This is done under supervision of course.

Love your recommendations.
My Wife has kept me locked the past 7 years in a CB-6000S, both plastic and stainless steel model. We have been married for 13 years and I gave her a CB-2000 as a gag gift for Xmass before we married. I had no idea she would become so demanding about making me always be wearing it.
Any reason I came up with she soon shot down saying there is no reason except for having sex that you need your penis to be free! Since you're not going to have sex it will remain locked!
Every year more and more men like me are being kept locked by their wife. This will one day end the males having affairs. I've heard that wives having affairs is now more than husbands have.
Will one day it be expected that a man will be wearing a chastity device to honor his Wife?

Your KH sounds like a very loving women and you are one of the lucky ones, My KH is very good when we play but i think she don't understands and feels guilty at times

Thanks for posting your wife's essay on the often misunderstood topic of male chastity. My wife and I have played with it off and on for the past seven years. It's always at my urging and she will keep the key and hide it where I can't find it. I would be very happy if she were to initiate things. <br />
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Most of the stuff out there on the web is wanking fodder or very in depth on the subject. Reading it can be intimidating. Your essay puts things in perspective in a friendly and non threatening way. I plan on showing this to her this evening. <br />
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Thank you so much!

I sometimes wonder if male chastity is misunderstood as much now as it was a few years ago. Social media and of course sites such as EP and such sure do allow people to open up. The reality of chastity is that it doesn't mend relationships.....but if there is a trustful bond between both partners, the possibilities are endless.

i dont think that society an goverment will ever understand male chastity, as far as chastity even if there is little tiff in marriage like mine was it help bring us together an the love of marriage has grown so much even with me lock most of the time

Amen! Very well said. I think chastity can be the greatest statement of love and trust a couple can have.

that is so true about being in chastity the wife gets all the pleasure from having her hubby lock<br />
us hubbys here now lock just to do as told an obey wife mistress as she orders<br />
my wife likes the idea she can make me do all the house work washing doing floors then her

I just read your article about chastity on EP and found everything right on the mark. I am trying to get my wife into this and have a deep desperate need to be totally controlled by her. She has a hard time even teasing sexually. She is very sincere about love and sex. I don't think I will ever feel totally appreciated by her until she takes other lovers and denies me. I long to be humiliated, I guess it is just in my genes. I don't ever want to lose her, but I would love to jump start her libido even if it means being with someone else! I want her to become a strict, dominating, cruel, teasing ***** to me and I will finally feel like she is getting her moneys-worth out of me. I think women should have more than one man in her life. Go figure, just me expressing my opinion. Any advice to get her going?

The loss of all control is just so f*ing intoxicating for me!

I am dying to do this with my wife and have her cuckold me! Very hot!

I love this story, and thank you so much for sharing. My wife Mistress L learned very early that my attitude changed drastically as soon as i was allowed to ******, and i was quickly put in a CB-3000. I am usually only allowed out once a month as she has complete control. And that is only if i have given her the 20 ******* that she demands and must have obeyed every command given

Although there are some differences, what you posted does sound a quite a bit like my wife. With or without my chastity device she knows she is in total and complete control. But when she installs that device, usually when I am going out-of-town on a business trip, she being the KH, there is absolutely no way I can get satisfaction or pleasure myself until I get back and she decides to unlock it. Like some she has added feminization to it. She started with getting me into wearing panties full time then adding other items of lingerie as she got rid of my male undies, leaving me no choice. Of course then, since I was wearing panties like a girl, as she pointed out I also needed to sit or squat when I pee, like a girl. And the most recent, though it occurred a while back, was a little surgical procedure called a urethral relocation making it so that now I can only pee from between my legs like a girl too. So now I wear a chastity ring, of which she is the KH, and there is no question she is the one incharge of the family jewels.

Mmhh! urethral movement will make you an "almost" real girl!
I agree, and I took note of the things!

Do you still ********* from the end of your member or can you even do that?

Yes, but something needs to be pressing, like a finger, to temporarily close off the pee hole between my legs for it to work and of course without my chastity ring installed. Other wise my ********* comes out between my legs ... definitely an effective birth control, don't you think?

Spot on ... that is what my wife thinks too.

1 More Response

I totally agree with your wife. My husband is also in chastity, it is much more loving and helpful. I have added more, a touch of feminization.

Good for you ... my wife started with a touch of feminization then in a while included chastity. I admit, with her taking the lead it has brought out a better side of me and both of us are happy.

Super post- love the idea but have yet to take the plunge as like to *** more than my wife would allow. Still, I think it's going to be the next project.

funguy....communication my friend....communication.

argggg....I understand your point of view but you state "as a man, I want to ******......" I am no different than you my friend but the appeal with chastity is that she decides when I ******. I always have a "want"....she implements when I "need" to. Have you ever experienced any form of teasing? Chastity takes teasing to a whole new level....You'd have to admit that the moment a guy "blows"... his desire / wants.....drops off significantly. That does not occur with chastity.....the want is always there and for me, that's the best part of this intimacy....not the ******'s the road traveled that makes it a awesome journey..

I'm sorry, I can't accept that. As a man, I want to ****** waaaaaay more than you are letting him - twice a month and badly is terrible!<br />
When can you both arrive at the point where he has "learned his lesson" and will treat you right without the necessity of constant reinforcement? When will you let him ****** more?

Awesome advice.

Thank you for sharing thie love story. I have given my wife a CB6000 which we have used for play. I would love it if she would lock me up and tease me for long periods. But she is reluctant to take control. I don't want to make her do something that she is uncomfortable with.

Lockmeup....about once every two weeks the unit is removed and a hair removal cream (Nair for men) is applied for about 10 minutes. Then its off to the shower to rinse and wash then unit is replaced immediately. Smooth as a nectarine :)