The Tale Of David Malcolm Morris

If there was an award presented to the most average person in the country, then Dave Morris would be odds on favourite to win. He wasn’t unhappy with his lot, neither was he especially blown away with how his life had turned out either over the last 31 or so years. He was the kind of guy that would find it hard to stand out in a crowd of two and he couldn’t remember the last time his own parents had remembered his birthday. He wasn’t entirely sure himself when it was, so he chose a different day each year upon which he would celebrate with an extra spoonful of sugar in his morning coffee. He had been in the same job for just over five years without progressing, unless you count the odd move sideways, but that was fine. Ambition for him was a dirty word, much like responsibility or enthusiasm. Other people found him aloof and tended to steer clear of too much conversation with him but again, Dave was more than comfortable with this because experience had told him that over the years, he wouldn’t find anyone that would keep him as entertained as himself. It wasn’t that he was fussy, or a particularly difficult person to keep happy, it was just that other people seemed to do a really bad job of it.

There was ten minutes left at work before he would be released back into normal society and the tedium of waiting at the bus stop for his lift home. Behind him his manager and Jean-Michael, or the man from France as he was sometimes called, were bickering about workloads and priorities for the umpteenth time over the past few weeks. Dave found their arguments amusing because they went over the same ground time after time after time without ever resolving the issues, both parties just deciding in the end to give up through complete exhaustion. A far more pressing matter for Dave was to try and work out where umpteen lay on a number line. Despite years of investigation, number crunching, trial and error and good old fashioned guesswork he had never come up with the definitive answer. All he did know was that it was probably likely to be but not definitely a number larger than 10.
Finally, the clock struck five o’clock in the most metaphorical sense of the word and like a greyhound released from the traps, Dave sprang up from his red office chair, undocked his laptop from the docking station, swung his bag around and over his shoulder and mumbled his goodbyes to his colleagues. This was as breezy as things got in his life, for even his name was as mundane as they came. Every time he introduced himself to someone all they heard was ‘Hello, I’m Dull Mehmeh.’ Once, he departed from convention and introduced himself as ‘Mundave’.

‘That’s an unusual name,’ the other person had said completely failing to see the clever punnery. This only served to reinforce his view that he was working on a different intellectual plane to his peers. Not necessarily a higher one, but very much a different one.

He got to the bus stop as the clock on his ipod showed four minutes past five. It was a clear cold January evening and his breath was visible against the chilled air as he breathed out. There was no one else at the bus stop, and he was in plenty of time for his. As he stood at the stop, checking the timetable as he did every time to make sure it hadn’t been surreptitiously changed during the day (which it hadn’t), something didn’t feel quite right to him. It was too quiet. The road was usually fairly busy and usually, as he stood waiting for his bus, he was passed by dozens of colleagues in their warm, air-conditioned company cars. Tonight though, for some reason there was none. But it wasn’t just their absence that was obvious, it was the lack of any traffic whatsoever. No cars, no lorries, no motorbikes and strangest of all, no buses. There was always buses coming by, he thought, not usually the one that he wanted, but they were as regular as night following day.
GarryBarry GarryBarry
31-35, M
2 Responses Sep 25, 2012

I like how you ended it so abruptly. I like how you built it up, but then just ended it. Maybe this was a way of showing how boring and dull Dave's life was?

Or was Dave maybe you as an "office slave"?

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