My Life Secret.

I guess I have always loved the beat of the heart since I can remember hearing one. I can remember even when I was little being very embarrassed about it. Like it was something I should be ashamed of loving. It's just a sound afterall. But to me...it is more than that. It is life. When you listen to my heart...you know that when the bmp go up...I'm excited or nervous...no matter how hard I try to deceive you...my heart will not lie. I feel as if you have access to the real me...like you can actually hear my proverbial heart that I so rarely reveal...and never in full.
Maybe it's the introvert in me...but I love to listen to my own heartbeat. I could and have listened for hours. My husband knows I like to listen to his and I like when he listens to mine. But he doesn't know the full story. When he pulls out his stethoscope...he doesn't know that my deepest and longest held secret is exposed to him. He doesn't know just how long I have dreamed of someone close to me listening to my heartbeat. He doesn't know that I feel violated when someone (other than a doctor) tries to listen to/ feel my heartbeat/ pulse. I can't be the only person who has a family with a nurse. Nothing worse than having my heart listened to in front of my entire family. I would never openly allow anyone I don't trust listen to my heartbeat. But my husband doesn't know that...he just thinks I like the sound of his...because everyone does that with their significant other. If only I had the strength to tell you what it really means to me. Until then...it remains my secret.
c4under c4under
26-30
3 Responses Sep 8, 2012

for me it's the same thing with my wife, but I love too listen to the beat of the heart that I told her of my passion, she understood and often makes me listen to his heart, if you want I'm on skype simoh1181, I'd like to hear listen to your heart and make you mine, of course, only girls;).

Oh C4, you posted a blog! Congratulations on opening up a little! Did it help you in writing about your experience with heart beats? It is not amazing to hear your own heartbeat? You read my entire blog that I wrote back in Dec 2011. you can keep your secret a secret or you can share it. Whatever you do, don't beat yourself up for enjoying to listen to your heartbeat. We all heard our mothers heart beat at about 4 months in the womb. So for about 5 months we heard our mothers heartbeat.

I can only imagine when I was in the womb, when I was coming out I said "Hey, where did that lub dub sound go? And I'm very cold here, get me a warm blanket! And I want to heart that lub dub sound again, that sound brings me comfort" but all that at one second old came out as "AHHHHHHH" in baby language.

is it any wonder we like the heart the comfort of the lub dub sound non stop?

I know exactly what you mean. I find it to be the most soothing and comforting sound in the world yet feel shy talking about it. One one hand for me it is erotic and kinky on the other it is just relaxing and non sexual.