A Thought From the Other Side of the Rickety Fence.

Up until I came on to this site, I had never really considered what men see in younger women.

I mean, obviously, there is the physical appeal of youth, as well as the vitality of spirit and girlishness that is often replaced with a calm with the onset of a deeper emotional maturity.

But by and large, I tended to accept the objections that people raised in relation to age-disparate couples. What interests could they possibly have in common? What about those crucial differences in life stage? And is it not just another case of a man trying to regain some of his lost youth, stroke his ego and vampirise the energy and spirit of his young prize?

I would not ever rush to judge others for their choices, but nonetheless, those opinions are trotted out often enough to echo around the ears a little.

What the EP has reminded me of is just how superficial these surface differences are. The core of someone's spirit is something that is not age dependent. The choices and quandaries and battles that we face are as large and important no matter what stage of our life we are at. And simply because one has passed through that stage of one's life, it does not mean that one has all the answers, nor diminish the importance of the situation.

As stupid as it sounds, we are all people, regardless of age. That may seem obvious, but it holds true on a very deep layer as well. There are men out there who love the  feminine, that core essence, the life story, the perspective, the framing. Men who love women, in the generic sense.

And age is not of great consequence in this - exceptional women are exceptional women, regardless of their age. That said, a story in the making has a certain allure that a story mostly told does not.

I am not sure how widely this applies outside myself. Perhaps all I am really saying is that in the past I would  have been unlikely to consider a serious relationship with a woman much younger than myself. But, thanks to EP, this is no longer the case.

For the ******* record, this is not a suck-up, nor a personal ad. :P I am just trying to express my honest thoughts on the matter, and it would be appreciated if this was treated as such. In the words of that EP Group title: "I'm Not Here For Dating". (Apparently).
TheTardyDodo TheTardyDodo
31-35, M
8 Responses Aug 14, 2007

Agreed. People are people. Love is love. No boundaries, or rules matter between you two consenting adults. Age gap relationships have been around since the beginning of time. They will continue until the end of it. Society will change its view of them eventually, as they have a million times before. If they don't, then oh well. People will still be happy in those relationships.

Here is where I think that after awhile chronological/biological age is irrelevant, but people make judgments on appearances. <br />
<br />
We are more than just our bodies. We are spirit/soul/heart and I don't believe you can put an age on that at all. I may have matured and hopefully become wiser, but I don't believe I have ever "felt" over 30 years old if that. Perhaps that's why I remain positive, continue to challenge myself, and will forever seek out adventure in the world. If we have to "act" our age... I will never act as if I am old, just because this shell that I am in is x number of years old. <br />
<br />
I will continue to live life to the Max as long as I can. Best Wishes! Mel

I'll talk to any woman ... the younger ones (35 to 40) tend to find me interesting. The real young ones (21 to 30) I really have no connection to. It's like we are from different worlds. For me it is just interesting to hear them and how they relate to the world. I'm a "daddy" figure to them and I like that. I'm always up for a good conversation so they use me as a sounding board for whatever is bothering them.

Good point Angel73! I just happen to like men taller than me - it's a personal perference as is liking older men!

good to see that you think things out yourself :D

w/e the circumstance i think it's best to silence the judgement calls in our heads until we actually meet the people we are so quick to judge

I once dated a man 17 yrs my senior. We were an extremely social couple and it was rare to get through an evening without the awkwardness of stares and whispers from those who knew little of us if anything at all.<br />
<br />
In summation: those who knew us individually as well as a couple understood our attraction and connection. It wasn't some complicated psychological this or that. We were simply compatible at our cores.<br />
<br />
HOWEVER ... I MUST add that I've witnessed younger women dating older men for many self interested purposes and vice versa; older men dating younger women for self interested purposes. I'm sure those who did not know he and I, the ones that were whispering and staring from across the room, were the ones that were assuming self interest was involved rather than compatibility. <br />
<br />
Nonetheless, it happens both ways.

Sounds like someone enjoyed playing that Snap, Eep, and Beep game with uh, the younger ladies, than he's ready to admit! heheehee. Yeah, I'm on to you! ;P