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I Like to Flirt

How To Backfire Flirting To Let The Guy Know To Get The Hell Away:

By: MonsterBeneathYourBed
Written on January 1st, 2013

Boy: Where have you been all my life?
Girl: Hiding from you.

Boy: Haven’t I seen you some place before?
Girl: Yes- that’s why I don’t go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I’ll go to mine.

Man: Hey baby, what’s your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: I’d go through anything for you.
Woman: Good! Then you can start by going through the door.

Man: How did you get to be so beautiful?
Woman: I must have been given your share.

Man: Go on, don’t be shy. Ask me out.
Woman: OK, get out.

Man:I think I could make you very happy.
Woman:Why? Are you leaving?

Man:What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
Woman: Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

By: MonsterBeneathYourBed
Age: 22-25 , Female
480 people have read this story

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39 responses
  • EzyPowa
    EzyPowa

    Funny.

    Apr 16
    1 like
  • ceoman
    ceoman

    Wait a minute...I hear those all the time.

    Apr 16
    1 like
  • mlachi214
    mlachi214

    hey whats up my metabolism slowed down a long time ago lol

    Apr 6
    1 like
  • Justlifegoeson
    Justlifegoeson

    Man:What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
    Woman: Nothing. I can’t talk and laugh at the same time.

    I love that one!! hahaha

    Feb 15
    3 likes
  • katykitten67
    katykitten67

    love it !

    Jan 15
    2 likes
  • idlewatcher
    idlewatcher

    Man:I think I could make you very happy.
    Woman:Why? Are you leaving?

    HAHAHAAH great post!

    Jan 14
    2 likes
  • silentwriter180
    silentwriter180

    Absolutely brutal!!

    Jan 14
    1 like
  • thoughtbubble
    thoughtbubble

    ROFL.

    Jan 4
    1 like
  • CableDawg
    CableDawg

    I just cracked up. The guy in my office asked if I was okay.

    Jan 4
    2 likes
    • thoughtbubble
      thoughtbubble

      You must have said : Till you asked. (Carrying the spirit of backfire, LoL).

      Jan 4
      1 like
    • CableDawg
      CableDawg

      Lol

      Jan 4
      1 like
  • MonsterBeneathYourBed
    MonsterBeneathYourBed

    I'm very much glad you like this thing. I myself had a laugh and I used to try some of those lines before :P

    Jan 4
    1 like
  • LisbethTylerMorgan
    LisbethTylerMorgan

    This is so awesome!!

    Jan 3
    1 like
  • JAGandVSfan
    JAGandVSfan

    So glad I'm married and away from the dating scene.

    Jan 3
    1 like
  • tinymuel
    tinymuel

    While I was stationed in S Korea I was sitting in a club in TDC with one of the women in my squad & several of her female friends from other 2 ID units on post. I wasn't out to score with them as I out ranked them & it is against the UCMJ. But one girl was pretty cute. There was also a Johnny Come Lately (FNG) in that bar & he kept buying her drinks, asking her to dance & constantly interrupting our group conversation. She finally got enough, so when he approached again she said, "Look! GOD put one ***hole in my panties....I don't need another one!" talk about taking the wind out of his sails

    Jan 3
    3 likes
  • funlovin68
    funlovin68

    That's awesome. I have to tell u tho. The best line I ever heard was "hi I'm a freelance gynecologist". It earned him a seat. Not to mention he was hot anyway lmao

    Jan 3
    2 likes
    • thoughtbubble
      thoughtbubble

      She must have said : I am into Orthopaedics. :-) :-)

      Jan 4
      1 like
  • Alyzia
    Alyzia

    This is too funny for words.

    Jan 3
    1 like
  • EmpressLya
    EmpressLya

    This is too funny. Can I copy it?

    Jan 2
    1 like
  • PrivateLegit
    PrivateLegit

    Lol.. More like sarcasm to me..Too funny..Thanks for sharing..

    Jan 2
    1 like
  • Anuledroan
    Anuledroan

    I really like this, it is both realistic and humorous! Thanks!

    Jan 2
    1 like
  • Ginteru1
    Ginteru1

    That's just harsh. The guy might actually like the girl, and she just spits in his face for his efforts.
    But then comes the fact that most douchebags also flirt, which, in my case, I'm okay with them falling off of their little towers of ego.

    Jan 2
    4 likes
    • thoughtbubble
      thoughtbubble

      Thats just a joke, no ?

      Jan 4
      1 like
    • Ginteru1
      Ginteru1

      Indeed it is!

      Jan 4
      1 like
    • LoveToads
      LoveToads

      The line of consistency running through these jokes seem to be a message from women about getting to know one another before flirting. These are pick up lines very commonly used by men and they are boring! Please come up with some new ones. :-)

      Jan 4
      1 like
  • ronickakishi
    ronickakishi

    haha lel

    Jan 1
    1 like
  • Poohbear17
    Poohbear17

    Hahahahahahaha! This is hilarious!

    Jan 1
    1 like
  • blkngrn
    blkngrn

    LMFAO

    Jan 1
    1 like
  • Kathieredart
    Kathieredart

    Sign=do not enter.... Funny stuff. Thanks!

    Jan 1
    1 like
  • angelicsmiles
    angelicsmiles

    This is funny. :)

    Jan 1
    1 like