Wish I Had The Courage To Go Out As The Real Me

i have been crossdressing since i was young and have been attracted to men for well since i can remember. i always dress as myself at every chance i get but the trouble is nobody knows about me and they would kill me if they found out. one night i was so horny i had to be with someone. i had never done anything like this before so as it got later i went out to find someone only in boy form i wish i could go out in girl mode but i am just to scared. i went to a well known gay area and after i arrived i sat down for a few mins i felt sick with nerves but carried on as being so horny it just took over me . now this is one of my first times ever being with another man well sucking his **** anyways. i walked uo to the toilets and after about ten mins or so a man alot older than me walked past me staring at me i nodded my head at him and he held his hand out i was shaking at this point i reached out and took his hand. we were walking towards the toilets when he said is this your first time. i just nodded again he smiled at me and said lets go over there instead as i walked past the entrance of the door i could hear loud groans and moans and was so excited now. we kept walking and ended up behind a few trees the man instantly started undoing his trousers and dropoed them to the floor along with his underwear. without realising i was already on my knees i looked up at him as he stepped forward his **** touching my lips i grasped his **** and opened my mouth and started to suck his shaft. he smelt sweaty and tasted so good he was fairly old and i was about 19 i kept sucking feeling his hands on the back of my head just gave me a great rush. i heard a noise behind me and i went to look but he just pulled me back towards his body i kept sucking and sucking i knew someone was behind me i could hear him playing with himself. it felt like seconds but it had been about 15 mins i felt something hit my cheek i realised right away that the other man had *** on me i heard him zip up amd walk of i was still su king the old mans **** i felt his had wipe my face and felt him rub the *** i could hear him moaning and knew he wanted to *** on me aswell i pulled his **** out from my mouth and kept pumping his **** with my hand i smilled at him and felt him shoot his load over me it wasnt a big load but i loved it. he pulled his underwear and trousers back up as i stood up he said did i want to go inside but i was still to scared. i said no he walked of and told me to bring some protection next time i visit. i stood by the door way listening to all the noises coming from inside. i wiped my face clean and went home. i went back there the following night with protection but he never appeared men kept walking in and out bit i just hid in the dark i am still to scared to go inside just incase. i sttill only dress when i am alone but wish i could just be myself and do what i want. i would love to be used like that again and still want to be even if i have to dress in boy mode so please get in touch if you want a young sub crossdresser on his knees in some woods or something and if it goes really well i would love to be the real me one night for you. x x x x
xdsubamy xdsubamy
26-30, T
1 Response Jul 17, 2013

Irs a shame you dont have the confidence to dress and go out. You look fabulous. As always your friend. Gr8ba

Awwwww babes your so sweet but your right i am not that confident and the fact that if someone i know sees me out dressed my life would be over x x x

You need to live your life for yourself hun. Dont let others make you hide yourself away. You're very beautiful and more people need to see that

Awwwww babes that is so sweet x x x