It's Too Late For MeI have been married a long time. I supported my husband through all his endeavors, I have been the good wife, I have never cheated on my husband and he has always gotten what he wants, he wanted to be a cowboy, we bought a ranch. He wanted to be a sailor, we bought a boat, his truck was not big enough we bought a truck that cost the same as most houses in America. We have put off having children so he could get his college degree, start a ranch, go sailing, pay of the truck, live in a foreign country. And all along I supported him, all the while asking him if we can now start a family, always something, lets pay this off first, lets finish this first, wait until this is done. Well... I'm now 46.
I was once a very nice, kind, giving loving person that loved life had a great attitude and was always happy. I no longer know who I am, I'm mean, bitter, angry, mad. and all I want is a child, that is all, but now I'm way to old, I have less than a 2% chance of having one. I'm too old to adopt internationally and too old to wait for an American baby. I'm pretty sure this is where my "madness" is coming from. I'm turning into that mean bitter old woman. Please don't suggest I enjoy life, go experience life etc... what do you think I have been doing for 46 years? You name the country and I have probably lived in it, we "took" the time to enjoy life and for 20 years I have been begging for a child and he has constantly given me excuses not to. now here I am, old and bitter. and you ask, what about him? he is out chasing 20 year old tail, he loves the young ladies, I'm sure soon enough he will impregnate one and have an offspring, and here I sit the bitter old woman. I would leave him in a minute for a widowed man, or divorced man with a few younger kids!
kiki1234 46-50 4 Responses 0 Jul 18, 2010