Your Personal Wh0re!

2 weeks ago my grower buddy sends me a text and wants me to find moonshine. (gawd rolling my eyes really?) It's a lot like any other drug, you know it's around but you're kind of eff'ed if you can't get a hook up. "OK, I'm on it" I send about 8 of my closest a text

"Hey!! I'm looking for some moonshine..? :) can ya help a deviant out?"

As a result I get a 3 lemme ask responses, a few "LOL" responses, and 1 solid YES. (EFF ME SIDEWAYS) SWEET!!! I am not really happy about the individual that sent the confirmation and I know for a fact he is interested in me.  We small talk text and the next thing I know I am going to meet him at a local bar to watch the Patriots WHALLOP the Texans 42-14. That was the saving grace of the evening, but I digress. 

I get to the bar early and am waiting in the parking lot. I am a bit concerned about what the evening might bring, and I know for a fact I am going to keep both my feet on the floor. I realize how much of a weird place I am putting myself in. I text my moonshine requesting buddy:

ME: "You know what another name for a dealer is?"
RD: "Pusher??"
ME:"W H O R E - you know I'm right"
RD: "Yup" "Don't put yourself into anything you don't want to be in , its not a big deal if I get it"
ME: " I only spread my legs for really special occasions, this isn't one of those times"
RD: "Gotcha"
ME: *****
RD: "****"

The night was fine, the game was great, the burger at this dive bar was the best one I've had in a long time! I want to go back there just to get another burger, and the homemade chips.... DELICIOUS. Oh and did I get my shine? NO... dude played that angle... "Well I have to call and ask cuz'..... what I heard "blablahblah."..******* *****!   He did pay the tab. NICE!!

The night ended with a hug for player dude... despite trying to push drinks on me, his drunken "I'm so horny" comment, and a couple obvious gawks on his part.. Retard !!   I knew this was what was going to happen, but a ***** has to check these things out.

Derangedjdub Derangedjdub
36-40, F
Dec 16, 2012