Have to

My 26 years old boyfriend is playing child, and refusing everything. Every smallest desicion, he can not decide to eat or not eat, so in the end of course he does not eat. I tell him, that when he acts like this. He decides every night if I sleep or if I don't sleep. But as he can not decide, he decides I don't sleep.
I have a full time academic job, where I have to be good. Everynight I drink two cups of tranquillization tea. And sleep maybe 5 hours but need 8. At work I have to function like everything were normal. Every evening I call my boyfriend and beg him to go come back to live.
He says he can't. Yesterday he was back for 1 day and said sorry and said he wants to change. today he is back in refusing again. I visited him in mental hospital and when I realized, I waited for 1 hour and played loosing my mind. Cried around absolutely crazy, as he did not react. I told him, if he wants to be this day with me, I wait for him outdoor for half an hour enyoing the sun. I waited half an hour, then phoned him he had his chance and I will visite him in 3 day again. I hope I will hear earlier from him.

I do not want to live this double life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LittleAnt LittleAnt
31-35, F
Mar 22, 2009