All Hail.

Living alone is a financial luxury I allow myself and never begrudge. Oh the joy of not feeling anxious as you head home, wondering who is in a bad mood. Finding everything where you left it. Looking appalling and not caring. Painting house parts in colours no one else would approve, like fire-engine red skirting boards. A mediterranean bathroom, with a French country kitchen and a  Chinese themed loungeroom.
Silences that are warm and friendly. Space. Peace.
And I don't agree with the oft-mentioned complaint that single people living alone end up selfish or set-in-their-ways. They do that only to the same degree as others. Others just do it family groups or couples. We ALL get used to doing things a certain way in our private spaces and homes, and feel put out or disturbed when the rhythm is interrupted. Try going away with a couple some time.
I understand there are aspects of life, love and personal growth I miss out on by choosing to live alone (in my case childless also) but
for some people the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
Samerac Samerac
36-40
8 Responses Aug 4, 2010

You've highlighted some things I can relate to; sadly it ppears some people function well at home ONLY when they're left alone. Otherwise, an unspoken rule states that every possible error must be corected on the spot; since my parents have taught me to abstain from unleashng such corrections, I tend to be puzzled as to why others should unleash their corrections on me.<br /><br />As with you, my advantages for living alone outweigh the drawbacks. I look forward to doing so again at some point within the next 6 - 12 months, hopefully.

Thanks for your answer...in the meantime one was playing on my lap recently - didn't really stop to relax but was distracted enough to be on me. And another one has just let me give him a facial rub last night - it was a great moment because this one is almost always inside and often close but never actually lets me touch. I am a happy chappy! You might be right about some remaining aloof. That's ok, so long as I have a few that interact I am happy to have introverted family members!<br />
Have a good weekend!

Well Samerac - as you have just said one is taking cheese from your hand, so that is coming around :) The two who stay outside, they may not come around. I had one like that. Eventually he ran away. He was an outdoor cat too. I think those types of cats choose to be wild and want to just run with the other cats out there. But you have done your best with those vet visits and that was wonderful of you to even get them that far. You might need some leather work gloves for that kind of handling :) I don't think they hold any of your treatment against you. I think it is just the particular cat's nature and personality. Luckily most cats are loving. I'm thinking even the wilder ones, as long as they are getting their food and water outside, they will probably hang around for a good while too. Have you tried putting some cat toys outside for them? That might get them hanging around longer too. You might even be able to sit outside while they play with their toys. I found that not touching them and letting them come to me out of their own curiosity was something that worked for me. I know you're enjoying all of them and that's great ! Happy Thursday! :) xox

hey phatnhapi, do you really think the others will come round eventually? <br />
I have had them since March and had to catch them to get them all to the vets for desexing and vaccination - it was awful and the kittens were almost hysterical with fear - climbing walls and my hands got shredded. I can't help thinking they will never forget it and never trust me. <br />
Cannot for the life of me understand why ONE has turned out so affectionate and fearless. She's a real 'world is my oyster' girl and lives like a loved child - no fear, assuming good of everything. One will take cheese from my hand, and occasionally bat me with his paw, and one is just beginning to tolerate a tentative touch. But two barely come in the house and run every time I appear. Do hope they will soften one day -I hate to think of them living always on the alert and thinking my place is unsafe.

Ahhh i'm happy to hear about your furry family :) Yes all that unconditional love is a joy indeed. I have had cats all my life and they are a joy to have around and love. Currently i don't have one of my own but my neighbors cats visit me and we all get along just fine :) The one that considers my porch also his porch and who i feed when i am out there, now he comes for love and not just food.. lolol .. The other one just passes through my yard and says hi on his way to other things :) <br />
I had a very tactile kitten once too. She was black and white and she would put her paw gently on my face like she was petting me. Very very affectionate and talkative and expressive. You could see a smile in her eyes. <br />
Mum and her kids were wise to choose your house as their home and refuge. I'm sure they can sense the love from you and respond to it. The babies will come around in a short amount of time, no matter how wary they may seem now. I love animals too. Right now all mine are outside the house :) The wild ones :) So do enjoy your fur babies and let us know how they are all getting on :) xox

Lovely! Delighted to hear you enjoy it too!<br />
I have in fact managed to find myself the owner of a family of cats - Mum and five youngsters that now share the space. Four of the bubs are still very wary, but one is just the most affectionate and tactile creature I have ever known, and Mum, after years of being a stray, is learning to regard my home as hers and sleep soundly on my bed or couch. They are a warm and welcome group of housemates! Animals will always be welcome and another freedom I enjoy is being able to say yes when something like this crops up!

Samerac - i love your desc<x>riptions about being alone. I think of it as bliss too. It is peaceful and makes you feel free. If you want to spend an hour or two on your porch drinking cups of hot tea and watching clouds and nature and basking in its presence you may do so without any prodding by anyone to do anything other than that. Reading a book is a luxury you're able to indulge in. As you say also about the creative painting, it is a joyful thing to indulge in too. As always i say i can be alone but never lonely. So many things i like to do, make jewelry, color mandalas, very calming, all kinds of puzzles are fun and of course time spent here enjoying reading interesting people like you :) xox

I can totally relate my inner most feelings to this.