No Sex Marriage

I have been married for 8 years but together for a total of 12 and I have no sex.  We didn't even have sex on my wedding night.  I know he thinks of sex and watches **** but we never do "anything".  I'm done. 
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9 Responses Aug 4, 2010

Save money, get the hell away from your crazy husband. He must be possessed by the devil. He needs an exorcism!

Watching **** is not a low level of anything.<br />
Watching **** to the exclusion of you is high treason. He doesn't want a BJ? He a bastard and he should be treated as such.<br />
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Leave. Pack the bags and go find someone who enjoys a good BJ and will be happy to reciprocate. If you can and are strong enough. Some of us (me included) need more time but are slowly making plans. Just try and follow through. I'll go ahead and say it since I didn't see Anar here yet… 'He doesn't love you.'

I'm not trying to make excuses, but here is some interesting facts that may be a little helpful. Over 20 percent of all marriages are in this category. You are not alone in this at all. There are many factors that can create a sexless marriage. For one, it is a very unfortunate fact that a man’s sex drive reaches its peak in his 20’s while a woman reaches hers in her 40’s. Also, A man’s testosterone level can be greatly reduced due to poor health and this is a major cause of lack of sex drive. It could very well be that you both still love each other very much but just do not know how to re-kindle the fire.There are so many books and links online about this topic and if there is still love there, it would be worth it to the both of you to research this. It is also very easy to blame the other for the lack of sex when in fact it takes two as we all know. The problem is, the less frequent that it happens; the more the feelings of resentment and abandonment occur between both parties involved. If you truly love your partner, don’t sit around wishing and waiting for it, take the bull by the horns and make it happen.

I had a sex life with my wife for the first part of our marriage. But it has been more than 5 years since she has allowed any intimacy. I long for the same things you do as you have described in your other posts. I would love to have someone to hold at night who would appreciate and welcome my touch. Hope you find someone.

Mine is a similar story. Lets encourage each other to move past the fear & seize life while we can.

You are NOT in a marriage. It's 12 years of sharing a room and it's 12 years too long. You are absolutely right... you are done. <br />
Please move on and find your happiness and a true marriage.

I think you are in a "Sexless Co-habitation", not a sexless marriage.<br />
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Don't turn it into a marriage.<br />
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Bale. Hit the silk. Depart. Vamoose.

Time to leave him. Your's is NOT a marriage. Please choose your own happiness over this farce of a relationship. Every best wish for a better future.

If you have no kids with him, it will make the painful separation even easier. It takes a lot of courage to leave. Lord knows I need to muster some up, but I have 2 children, so it is different for me. Get out while you can or go to couples therapy. Good Luck