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Today Not A Good Day.......

Been unhappy in my marriage for 2 yrs and I refused to let it go any further!!
So I have made the decision to leave my marriage, move away to be with family and friends. In 1 afternoon I found a house in the country to rent, found a job and opened up my new bank account. I'm happy that I found the strength to move forward, but for some reason today, I am so sad and lonely. Just hoping there will be that special someone out there to enjoy life as I do. Just not feeling very optimistic today!

Desirestouch
desirestouch desirestouch 41-45, F 11 Responses Sep 6, 2010

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DT - Lots of luck to you!! You've done what a lot of people in here have thought about before. Some have done, some have not. You have to make your own way. I hope you find that person that not only loves you for yourself and is the very best combination of characteristics that you can easily love and be tolerant of the differences between you. Most of all, I hope, once you find that person, it will be someone who will be completely compatible with you!!! You deserve it, now that you've taken a leep away from that which caused you pain.<br />
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I agree with some of the other comments that you may feel sad (grieve) the old life, simply because it's a change in routine and relationship. Any of us, who enjoy anything about our lives, would feel that way with change. But, there are better days for you, and you've taken the risk and are determined to beat the pain.<br />
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Awesome. I want to know how it works out, so I can celebrate with you when it happens. Maybe, even, perhaps, you won't feel like being on this site anymore!! Wouldn't that be a great day.<br />
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Good luck to you.

NSHU<br />
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Thanks for your comment and I understand what your saying. But I am on my way to happiness and I know what it takes.That is why I am leaving my marriage to make myself happy!! My goal is to take time for myself to relearn who I am once again and not have anyone tell me who I am or what I like. I am happy for myself that I even had the courage to make the decision, but it is one small step at a time on this journey.<br />
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I'm happy that I can even say that I want to love again and be loved, and sorry but I don't always feel that everyone will let us down. I have faith in people. We just need to find the right ones. The ones that fail us are the ones that make us who we are and that only makes us stronger!<br />
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It is going to be hard to start over......Bring it on......I am ready!!<br />
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DT

Great post. I would only add don't look for your happiness in another person. Find happiness in yourself & who YOU are. When we depend on others for "our happiness" we will fail every time. It is human to think that "that person" will make us happy. When truth is only we can make ourself happy. That doesn't mean you can't meet somebody to share your life with. It just means don't depend on them to "make you happy". People will fail us every time. :-)

Look up pheromones on the internet and buy some.<br />
Usualy cost about $ 60 for 3/4 of an ounce.<br />
You may have to try a few companies there are a lot of phonies in the pheromone business.

DT, <br />
You should be proud of yourself. <br />
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We should all be proud of you. it is encouraging to see a person cut off this nonsense before it gets too crazy.

Hello independent, resourceful, courageous woman !<br />
These sort of characteristics are ones many people find attractive and engaging. Now you are in an environment where you can display them, just by being you - which is a fine thing to be.<br />
As you find your feet, consolidate, spread your personality around your new environment, things will happen. They tend to happen at their own pace though.<br />
Tread your own path.

Don't know whole story but as someone else said, if you did all you could do to save your marriage but nothing worked, then all the more power to you. Look at what you accomplished in one day. Now think what you can accomplish with the remainder of your life. Not one to always congratulate one on ending a marriage, but I trust you are doing that which is best for you. Instead, I will wish you luck and peace....

After being with someone for a long period of time and then being on your own can get lonely. The one thing you have to keep in mind IMHO is that you are better off, since you can now be truly happy. It may not happen quickly, but now you can find someone who allows you to be you without compromise. Someone who wants you and not just needs you. It will get better, just keep your head up.

Congratulations! You are FREE and your own person!<br />
Of course you are feeling down a bit - I think it always happens when we tear ourselves away from life we are used to - no matter how much unhappy we were living it - it's our safe habitual routine. And the person we lived with becomes part of our life, and we miss them too. Just acknowledge these feelings knowing that they were to be expected. They will pass soon.<br />
I am happy for you, just give in to the joy of freedom!

DT, may I suggest you read my story of 20th April 2009 called "The Last Forty Eight Hours"? I think it will resonate with you in many ways at present. And then, look at my most recent blog "Playing House" written in January of this year. . . . . <br />
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The reasons I suggest these is that, hopefully, you will recognise much of your own felings in the first - and then see how FAR life can move in a relatively short space of time. . . I hope this gives you courage to face the demons that are confronting you today - and reason to believe you HAVE done the right thing. {{{Hugs}}}

You are not alone. I know how you feel. I have been out for two weeks now & I have moments being very lonely, but then again, I had them when I was home too. I just need to find good productive healthy ways to occupy & fill my time. I / we are here for you & I am sure that others that have gone before will offer true words of encouragement.