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Vasectomy And Loss Of Sex Drive.

Due to the sexless nature of our marriage and the Talk in October etc, etc H has finally done something about his lack of desire and seen the doctor. 

Very interesting it was too!

Firstly - his testosterone is actually higher than average and he should be very, very keen to have sex and lots of it (so something wrong there).  Doctor suggested his lack of desire was probably psychological.

Secondly - the doctor didn't know why he had been referred as everything is in working order - then he asked him whether he had had a vasectomy and who had suggested it?  Often it is the wife....... quite what we are to read into that I am not sure.  Except that if it's not the man's idea he maybe reluctant but not wanting to argue?.....  and yes, I had suggested it - because  I had recently had an extremely difficult birth with our second child, we knew we didn't want another, and I didn't want to remain on the pill ad infintum so why not him?  It's an easier op for men than having your tubes tied as a woman.   Or that is what we had been told.

After the vasectomy H was in quite a lot of pain for a few weeks.

The Doctor then said that  many men after a vasectomy lose their sex drive.  This is mainly psychological! 

We were never informed of this - if I had known I for one would never have asked. 

I would like to say that H is being to retrieve his sex drive, still not quite there, but there is improvement. 

Has anyone else known of this side effect of having a vasectomy?    A loss of sex drive? 

Update

Sex drive is slowly returning - but he has mentioned also that there was a significant loss of sensation when ej####lating - has anyone else had this problem too?
wisiwig wisiwig 46-50, F 49 Responses Jan 15, 2011

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That's funny, you'd rather have your guy in pain, and losing his desires (of course, you did your own full, independent research on this operation before you went ahead and suggested it), than pop a pill once a day until you stopped flowing once a month? Very nice.

My boyfriend (3 children) and I are experiencing the same problem with his lack of sex drive...His vasectomy was done before we met.....I had my tubes tied after giving birth to child number 5. And although his lack of sex drive is frustrating I would much rather have had my ex get a vasectomy because the pain experienced from this was far less then that of delivering his children and since having my tubes tied 85 days out of my year are excruciatingly painful and I will be having a hysterectomy at age 30 and I'm sure the recovery time from that is not a few days. So to suggest that a woman would push her husband into a vasectomy because she didn't want to take a pill everyday is a very ******* thing to say maybe you should consider researching a tubal ligation hysterectomy and the side effects of the pill patch shot and IUD while your at it throw in child birth I realize that a man's only part in the creation part is for the most point enjoyable so maybe you don't really know what your talking about. A psychological dilemma and 3 days of pain seems like the best birth control method !!!!

What a totally bizarre post. At 30 you supposedly have already had 5 kids. Possible, sure, but somewhat unusual these days. Getting your tubes tied does not create "excruciating pain" in any case: nowadays the procedure, with optical nanosurgery, is even simpler and not more invasive than vasectomy. If you have "excruciating pain" so often obviously the roots have to be found somewhere else. Having a hysterectomy at your age is absurd unless you suffer from cancer, in which case we're talking something else altogether. Any surgeon who takes off the womb of a 30-year old female will not do it except in very extreme and urgent cases. Which does in no way justify the cutting of a man's tubes with the risk of ending his enjoyment of sex altogether due to the numerous problems we hear connected with poorly performed operations. Male enjoyment of sex being of course the basis for the couple's enjoyment of sex altogether. With 8 kids, of course, your enjoyment must be limited these days, but it has nothing with tubes or testicles...

I'm beginning to think your a total idiot. My children were born 3/2004 while on the pill.. twins 8/2005.... 1/2007 while wearing the patch and 1/2008 with the shot. I'm not sure how 8 children would decrease the enjoyment of sex...it's still sex!!! And we have a combined 6 children one of my twins didn't survive child birth and my daughter passed away at 4 months SIDS.

The pain I experience during menstruation is unbearable and started after my tubal. I also suffer from depression all caused by the hormone changes caused by the tubal. Because of these changes my uterus doesn't work like it's supposed to causing extreme cramping, 6-10 days of bleeding that has made me anemic, and extreme PMS mood swings that the Dr is trying to control with birth control. It's fantastic really!!! I delivered my children with no pain medications at all and I would rather do that once a month then this!!! I will be having a hysterectomy for these reasons. And as far as your cancer comments basically the only use for a uterus after a tubal is a splendid breeding ground for cancer!!! I am by no means trying to say that the side effects for a man aren't a big deal what I am saying is that if nothing else works it is a much faster recovery with fewer side effects for the man.

You should seriously do some research. Birth control of every type has side effects and any person or couple considering one should read up and know "worst case scenario" what you can expect.

Mine definitely dropped. I was a once a day guy. Afterward it's like once or twice a week,and that's work. If I had known I would never have done it. Those that say it's physiological are psychological. There is a significant drop in ****** and in volume. And, since I didn't know what these people were saying beforehand, I found out AFTER I did it. They are plain full of it.

I am a farm boy from down south, I am so sorry that our men are not truly inform about the like of sensual desire after a vasectomy. On the farm, after the removal of the bull and hog nuts, you have cut the nerve that stimulate any sexual desire. After this is done, the animals are no longer sexually active and all they want to do is EAT. This increased the weight of the animal which we sold to market later in the fall. If we just think., when we spade or nutter our pets, WE ARE STOPPING THEIR SEXUAL DESIRE. If you just notice them, they do not hump, spray their territory, or are not really interested in smelling other dogs or cats.
Our dr's say that the man is mentally not interested, that is true, because the cutting of the tube cuts the DESIRE. In men, sexual pill will make you erect , much like a man is erect at night, but there is no sexual desire. When a man is erect at night or mainly in the morning, the erection is not for sex. The erection is the body cleaning the veins in the penis. There is no sexual desire at that time. Men gets many erections during the sleep process. If a man was to take a afternoon nap, when he goes into a deep sleep, you will notice that you might wake early and notice you have a semi hard-on. That's because the body was getting ready to go into full clean mode.
Most men, after a vasectomy will not say that they don't have the desire for sex. IT MAKE HIM FEEL LESS THAN THE MONCHO MAN WE ARE SUPPOSE TO BE. and he don't want his partner to think he is not interested in sex anymore. He knows and she knows the animal he was before he was snipped.
I am not a woman, but having the tubes tied is also cutting the sexual desire for sex. The same as a cat. If you notice a fixed female cat and a male tom cat, she will let him know right away that the sex shop is closed.
Many men with vasectomies will say there lady are always begging for sex, and they are because, because in nature, like on the farm, when the female comes in heat, her EGG is ready for fertilization. PEOPLE ARE THE SAME. The only thing I can advise a man or a woman to do is, touch,caress,and hold one another.
Having a reversal vasectomy will not re-connect the desire. I am so sorry, but the desire has been cut forever.
I have a handsome male friend that had a vasectomy, he is dating a beautiful flight attendant, she know he had the vasectomy but don't know why he isn't sexually aroused by her. He looks at me and say I DONT KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH ME. His dr gave him Viagra. He said it really makes him hard, but he would rather eat a steak than have sex. HE REALLY DONT KNOW THAT THE VASECTOMY HAS CUT THE - DESIRE. I will tell him what's going on with him soon.

Vasectomy is a form of castration, no doubt about it. In older times or for animals they removed the nuts or even the full bag - in modern times they only snip the tubes but the effect is the same. No kids, and gradually no desire. Plus the fact sex and particularly *********** are often unpleasant or painful for vasectomized males.

I had my tubes tied, and did not have any loss of sexual desire or the ability to climax and otherwise enjoy sex, so what Mlogan wrote here is not true: "I am not a woman, but having the tubes tied is also cutting the sexual desire for sex. "

In addition, when animals are castrated, their testicles are removed. That's very different than when doctors cut men's tubes that allow ***** to be **********. Men retain their testicles.

I've known men who have had vasectomies and who said it was no big deal and the operation didn't affect their sex drives or performance.

I guess it's different for different people.

I was impressed by 87William3 - who after hernia and prostate problems, was willing to have testosterone therapy, the pump, and possibly an implant so that he could have sex with his wife. It's hard for me to imagine a man doing all that.

Oh lord - keep us updated. I'll go for RISUG or whatever the yank equivalent is, but never a vasectomy. I've heard too many horror stories...

I am going threw the same thing with my husband. He is 29 and before his surgery 3 months ago he could not keep his hands off me. he would touch me and get a erection. Now nothing. he says he has no sex drive and his ******* are not the same and he (parden my french) has no more mornig wood. he is very upset about it. so you are not alone.

Having you tubes tied changes little for a woman. With optical laser surgery it is extremely easy to perform, is pretty much painless and does not affect the sex organs, just the reproductive system. So the old argument that it is so much easier to vasectomize a male than sterilize a female is rather worthless nowadays. Vasectomy directly affects some nerves and tubes linked to sex, and the feeling of having been neutered is very high in some males' minds (although others don't mind at all) - which it actually is. I would strongly suggest to married women to have their tubes tied by optical surgery after the birth they consider their last - it can be performed while they're in the hospital - rather than have a surgeon trim tubes in their husbands' balls. I've heard too many stories, firsthand, of men losing all interest in sex after the vasectomy, when sex wasn't downright painful. And doctors won,t be much help, saying it is simply psychological - but it isn't.

I have been told by multiple men to never get a vasectomy because it seriously ***** everything up.

It doesn't for most, but it does for some. Basically, it's playing Russian roulette with your balls and submitting to a dominant woman who doesn't want to get pregnant again and is afraid of being snipped herself.

If anyone I'm sleeping with ever mentions that possibility to me in the future I will kick their *** straight into the street. There are many women and I can always find another, but I only have one package.

That's what they say, but I've not met anyone who didn't have issues down the road from it...

You are right, foreskin. Are you doctor? Are you Jew? Have you had sex with foreskin? I don't think so. You got it as an infant most likely.

All info is in the internet. There is a book about vasectomy: look it up: dontfixit. It may give you some understanding about vasectomy. Or look it up: neonatal circumcision.

There is nothing philological about vasectomy. You are cutting essential tubs.

Guys, do you homework before any decision. I had my own surgery many years go, not related to V or Circ. And i am endless regret just for one reason: I did not investigate about side effects. I was suffering about 4 years, still have some side effects and I do understand how life miserable could be.

Dont fix it!!!!

Nonsense.

You're completely bonkers

Bot.

The similarity between circumcision and vasectomy is that doctors are making big money putting innocent infants (circumcision) and man (vasectomy) under tremendous risk absolutely without any reason. V is the worst thing that could be done to man in compare with any other surgeries: It changes hormonal level forcing testicles stop producing this hormone, it reducing sensation up to 90% (this number can vary), it brings inflammation of the body and many other side effects which could be discovered later. Changing hormonal level could lead to anxiety and depression. The other thing is Post-vasectomy pain syndrome. Please read about it.

Regarding circumcision: Man are losing their sensitivity and nobody who had it done as an infant even don't know what it feels like with forehead. Nobody in the world except M uslims, J ews, A mericans and C anadians do that procedure.
That is a biggest fraud done by US to the is citizen, violating human rights.

Guys, don't do vasectomy. You will be endless regret it. There is no warranty you will be in the range of man she have never been affected by vasectomy.

I wish everybody good health and happiness. Don't do it!!! Don't!!! Read about it online

It's not "forehead", it's "foreskin". And having known both, I can assure you that circumcision is a blessing...not even considering the heavy advantages for hygiene, health, and aesthetics. There is absolutely no connection between Vasectomy and circumcision of males - which is practiced in many more cultural environments than the ones you mention, since at least 35% of males today are circumcised, a figure in constant increase as benefits are more clearly realized. As for vasectomy, it does nothing about hormonal questions: the testicles still produce hormones and they get into the body in the same way as before. The only thing it does is prevent ***** from getting into the ********* - they just "dissolve" inside the balls as they are produced. The problems are the that the cut may be too tight, creating problems during erection, that the male may feel "castrated" (which, technically, he now is since he cannot impregnate a female any longer), that psychology and physical causes may cause changes in his mood and his sexual desires. Some people **** like rabbits once their balls heal, and some people stop ******* altogether. The only reason to do it to males is that castration is easy since the testicles are outside - for a long time castrating the female was a complex internal operation ("tying her tubes"). With current optical surgery through the navel or through the vagina the operation on females is much simpler, doesn't even require hospitalization, and after all the only reason for castration of one or both in a couple is to terminate their fertility: rather terminate the female's fertility since she's bearing the heavy part of pregnancies and births.

Answering on the question " I'm not joking it is equivalent partially to a female circumcision that is banned so why not some legality for the men. "

Doctors making money and A LOT. Same for circumcision, which also affect sensation. Don't do it for your kids. No circumcision, no vasectomy.

V decrease sensation and who is telling that this is not true are liers. They feel bad about it and they wish all man the sam "enjoyment" . Learn about reversal. It will not return 100% sensation, but it could be much better. It also will help to ovoid side effects later in your life. Good luck everyone!!!

There is no similarity whatsoever between circumcision and vasectomy, except both take place on male genitals. That's the stupidest comment. V is a sterilizing operation that, for most men, goes without problems.

I had a hard on the same day about 4 hrs after my vasectomy my sex drive is still way way up there!

Sure. And you ****** the Easter Bunny.

So because this wasnt your experience its not possible? I said i had an erection, i didnt do anything with it. I can assure you this happened. But hey, your experience was different, not my problem

I believe it! I got hard and came about 2 hrs after!

As much as reports of terrible pain are probably fakes in most cases, *********** a couple of hours after a vasectomy, when your balls are still swollen and on ice, is...highly unlikely.

Apparently you don't believe anyone. Yes, I did and in fact was ******* the next day too. Sucks to be you I guess!

I don't believe a single word of this tall tale, sorry. Unless you had a very special non invasive vasectomy, and even then. ******* right after a vasectomy would make little sense either way, since for a good three weeks you still ********* ***** still present in the tubes, and it takes about that time for the tests to show you're now shooting blanks. And the only point of the operation is...to shoot blanks.

I don't care what you believe! If my wife was on here she would back up everything I said. Even she couldn't believe I jerked off as soon as the numbness was gone. I never experienced any pain. You know nothing.

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A vasectomy should be a last resort. Whichever way you take it, it is a minor form of castration physically, but certainly a castration for our unconscious mind: once you can't reproduce inside a female, you're not quite a male any longer, but basically a gelding with erection privileges. Not even counting the fact that a lot of vasectomies create pain afterwards during sex, that many lead to lack of interest in sex, that several require intervention against serious infection...With modern technology let women who want to stop conceiving get their tubes tied. It is a lot more simple nowadays, painless, and at least they are the ones who choose. Men should not get castrated just to please women.

Your an idiot i still f*** like a man and i can assure you i get no complaints. I like the fact I can go bareback without risk of pregnancy. I did this because i wanted to. Your stupid little rant proves you know nothing about the process. For the record I had a urologist do it and they reconnected themselves (confirmed by a ***** test later) but i guess thats not possible either right

Wonderful if it worked for you. But spêaking about stupid, I find reall stupid to get yyour tubes cut in order to get them reconnected. You have a scrotal surgery fetish?

I said they connected themselves i didnt reconnect them, the body works in magical ways.

So what was the whole point? it's obviously botched surgery then, since the aim is to sterilize you and make sure y can't impregnate any longer. As for the erection after surgery, looks to me like a lot of vasectomies where nerves were nicked that shouldn't have...which is exactly the problem raised in theses posts. In most cases they cause a lack of desire, in a lot of cases pain during erection, in some cases erections at times you don't necessarily wish for them...

actually my husband had one. I had on a low cut shirt and I bent over to give him ice in bed and he got a errection. So it is possible.

From abc news...

The second occurs through a process known as re-cannalization, where the small tubes that are sealed off during a vasectomy spontaneously reconnect. It happens in less than one percent of all procedures and the cause is unknown.

"One potential cause of a late or early re-cannalization is something called a ***** granuloma, which occurs when a ***** leaks out of the vasectomy site. There can be a risk of ***** falling out and the ***** reconnecting," Williams said. "Fortunately, it's extremely rare."

Yep, botched op...even it's only 1% of case, if it's your balls and your wife, gf or mistress gets pregnant you can sue the guy who snipped you and was careless not snipping enough or failing to seal the tubes...

Are you for real? it is not easier for a woman to get one, I watched my husband have it done it tooke 10 minutes. He even had a erection when we got home. My husband and I have had 5 childre. It was a joint decision. He is no less of a man because he can't get me pregnant anymore. You guys out there get off your high horses . Your Penis is not some magestic throne. We give birth, we rip, tear, have scars for the rest of our lives, and the pain passing a 10lbs baby out your body is something no man could ever emagin or handle.So getting one little pin size insition on your testical is the least you can do. Be men and suck it up and loose your caveman mentality.

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i know a man who had a vasectomy the marriage lastest another couple of years and they are on their way too separation this year...in my line of work for 30 years i have met so many people at the office with similar problems and most have met new partners and moved forward....if there is a bedroom problem you can attempt do anything and it still does not always work...good luck hope it all works out for you....

I know one woman who has had it done and it was the best thing however she still divorced because it did not solve their sexual problem.

I had a vasectomy from a highly rated doctor two weeks ago, post op pain no problem, my sack hangs lower now and have to wear 2 pairs of briefs to keep them in place, but having had my first bit of sex I have found the ****** to be diminished, that is the draw from the balls, it would have been nice to have been told from the doctor that ****** could be affect, I wouldn't have done it if I had known, also I can feel the terminal ends of the vas as balls the size of a pea, so that also affects my own self fondling, it's like a piece of silk with a god awful knot, the beauty has gone from my sack, I say to all guys considering this to not do it, women have no idea, they think its easier and has no impact, but if they want an idea ask them how sex would feel without their nipples. I think I will be seeking some legal action on this as was not told of this. I have 3 children already and we could have had my wife's tubes tide but this should have been the less intrusive option, now thinking about the consequences my wife tubes tide would have had less impact on our lives, I will be happy for all vasectomies to be banned, save all men's *******. I'm not joking it is equivalent partially to a female circumcision that is banned so why not some legality for the men. I'm just wondering why this is not well publicised, I cant be the only man that gets the draw from the balls satisfaction, not to mention a head job will never be the same. Please anyone considering this operation just way up the cons and it is not worth it, wear a condom, at least you get the complete blow!

My husband had a vasectomy in the spring of 2009 at the tender age of 32. During the procedure he was in pain and the doctor had to stop and administer more anesthesia. My husband has had increased sensation ever since. He says his ******* are not intense at all. This has been so sad for him, and us and we don't know what steps to take to try to improve things.

You should blame yourself for having a 32-yr old male mutilated in his reproductive functions. He should blame the doctor who has cut him so young and apparently did a bad job. If a female doesn't want to conceive any longer there are numerous ways, and rather than have the testicles of her man castrated she should undergo an operation on her own tubes, which is now done very easily through the vagina or through the navel. Or enjoy anal sex when she's fertile...

He's now basically a eunuch. Admit it and act accordingly.

I am 49. I had mine one and a half years ago. Blew a load a few hours after surgery, never had much pain or problem, and my drive is through the roof!

i'm 44, got my vasectomy at 35. i've also had reduced sex drive and reduced fluid emission since the op. pain lasted a couple years for me. all dr's say there is no effect on libido from vasectomy but 1000's of men have it and say so online. the only explanation i've found is "it's psychological". but that doesn't always work. i was psyched to get the op. b4 and after. it's a real phenomenon which dr's simply deny.

My vasectomy did not decrease my drive whatsoever. It's been turned on full blast for years, and has not decreased before or after. I don't think there is any physiological reason for a decrease - hormones are still produced and distributed throughout the body as before.

I suspect that if you look to the circumstances under which vasectomies occur - a change in the number of children in the household, a change in lifestyle, or a resolution never to have children and why that might happen - that these are more likely the factors that contribute to the death of desire within the marriage.

Had a vasectomy 26 years ago. Never any problem with sex drive. As I've gotten older I do find cialis to be a help, but that's just age and not related to the vasectomy. I actually think my sex drive has stayed as strong as before the vasectomy

Hi W, My wife is requesting the same, i was not aware of this or the loss of sensation.
mmm makes me think. Thanks for the informative post. Good luck with the drive!!

I had a vasectomy 20+ years ago, at the same time I had a double hernia repair. There was plenty of pain and an awful lot of bruising and I wondered at the time if it was the vasectomy or the hernia repair, that hindered my sex drive. My sex drive seemed fine in the early stages of my marriage and it was often my wife that was "too tired." I had a satisfactory, albeit declining, sex life until I had my prostate removed which entailed removal of the seminal vesicles and two of the sphincter muscles that control urine. Before the surgery I noticed my erections were not what they use to be and certainly didn't last as long. After the surgery I've been completely impotent and slightly urinary incontinent. Last week I found that I have very low testosterone and now, for God's sake, my wife wants sex again. We are retired and she's not as tired as she was when working. I'm happy to oblige, but it means going for implants in my penis (I've tried the pump, the pill, the MUSE, all to no avail) without the seminal vesicles I have no ********* only a little urine...a lot of urine, if I really let go during ******...I understand they have a valve for that, too. I'm taking this one step at a time: first the testosterone, which I will start right away, if nothing else that should give me more energy and I've had very little of that the last two years. I'm doing my own research on the best implants (and talking to my wife about what she would prefer: girth or length) and I have talked to one man who has had the valve for urine (which I will continue to consider if my wife is uncomfortable with the urine, on the other had she might enjoy it as many of the women here have written about). By the end of 2013 I should be a fully functional "bionic man," I am excited with all the advancements of the 21st Century medicine; but I really expected we would have the flying cars by now. And now I've forgotten the reason for posting this response...I'm really hoping the testosterone will help with my focus and concentration. I'll post this and then go back and read the article so I will know why I wrote this.

my bf underwent a vasectomy 3 months ago and lost all sex drive...we are in a new relationship and i find it incredibley hard to live in a sex-less relationship. He is upset by it but it does'nt bother him as much as it does me. What am I to do? Have other males been through this, does the sex drive come back? Is there anything I can do? SHould I talk about it with him, or will that make it worse? HELP!!

You have to talk - there is no point in not discussing it. It seems to be mainly psychological. My H has got his sex drive back - it took time, but it's there. Please do talk to him - to repair your relationship it has to be both of you wanting this. A counsellor might help!

It is not only psychological. You should very likely consider that for emotional sex you'll still feel very good, but for getting ****** physically you may very well need to have lovers on the side. You can't alter what happened to his balls.

My wife wanted me vasectomized ten years ago, but despite the fact everything was scheduled, I had talked to other males and read enough, and decided not to. Several of my friends complained of real pain not only right after the tubes were cut, but for months if not years afterwards; pain during sex, particularly right before *********** - painful enough to lead you to avoid intercourse; infection, sometimes severe. Not even considering the feeling that you had been «castrated» which was present in a number of men. My wife tried to tease me as a «chicken» for a while, but it didn't work. I convinced her that anal sex was a more natural option to avoid babies during the few days of the month when she might conceivably get pregnant. If anyone asked me if they should have a vasectomy, my personal answer would be a resolute NO.

I had a vasectomy 20 years ago. Initially there was great sexual surge in our marriage. Gradually though, my desire became reduced and eventually disappeared. I realise this is probably a mental side effect - but it is however very real. I can no longer ********* during sex with my partner. I put this down to my vasectomy<br />
<br />
AC

I had my vasectomy about 9 years ago and sex has not been anywhere near as pleasurable since. I don't care what any one, especially any Dr. out there, says, I don't know why or how often, but I know absolutely from personal experience that a vasectomy can somehow, at least in some cases, cause some kind of seriously negative affects on how much pleasure a man can experience during sex. <br />
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I also know that in these cases, it is not in any way psychological. I have never had any less desire to have sex with my wife of just over 20 years. It is simply a fact that since the operation, ******* is no where near as strong or pleasurable experience since. <br />
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On rare occasions it feels about 70-80% as good as it once did. The average now, and has been ever since the vasectomy, is about 30-50% as pleasurable as it was before. In bad cases . . . which seems to be about a a quarter to a third of the time, the sensation is either almost nothing or, worse still, a somewhat uncomforable sensation of being strained/constricted somewhere.<br />
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Vasectomy sucks if you are unlucky enough to have these results. Depression is a real potential problem. If you have a similar experience let people know. Doctors have to be held accountable and someone needs to figure out what is done wrong during these procedures to cause such f''ing horrible outcomes.

You're the very example that led me to renounce being VCd. The husband of a woman who turned out - for that reason - to become a mistress of mine had ceased to have sex because his tubes hurt during sex and he gradually stopped ******* her. A colleague suffered from a major infection. Most men I read comments from complained about reduced size and intensity of ***********, which is one the bases for ******* in men. These are physical and not emotional or psychological problems. Women have always contented that it was easy for men to have a little snip in a bag easily accessible while having their tubes tied required extensive internal surgery. On the other hand, with rewcent advances in sugery you can easily have your tubes tied without any major incision, and the fertility of ovaries has no impact whatsoever on female ******* - wheras cutting our tubes can have a very negative impact on our sexual pleasure.

Great information and communication on this board. My husband and I are 37 and he just got a vasectomy 2 months ago. It was a mutual agreement as we have our 3 kids and we r happy w what we have. We had an awesome sex life, so much so that I would make up excuses not to have sex because I couldn't keep up w him. He could not take his hands off me. Now we probably mAke love 3 times a week and partially due to the fact he can't get hard. I think I cried for two weeks already and feel I am out of tears. I also know that he is under a lot of stress from work and he is going to be retiring next yr from the military, so he has a lot on his plate. However, all the stress was well before the vasectomy and his performance was fine. Could this be just another addition to the stress? I have tried to be understanding but I have felt he just wasn't attracted to me anymore or that I am just not good enough, to which it makes our relationship very painful. Sex isn't everything to me but to go from my man can't get enough of me to nothing, is difficult to deal with. Now I am at the point I don't waNt him to touch me because I am afraid we will get aroused only to be disappointed. This is even more of an issue as it is tearing us apart and him being the macho military guy he is, he will not seek counseling. I wish he never got it done, or at least not now and I am trying to be patient and understanding, but it is so emotionally painful.

To anybody considering having a vasectomy I would say this get an experienced professional who has done this operation many, many, times, preferably a urologist. I know how bad this can go wrong been there done that, but it didn't kill my sex drive. But now I have to use testosterone supplements or I turn into Clark Kent the mild mannered reporter.

When I had my vasectomy twenty years ago we did not have the luxury of the internet otherwise I would have been able to research it more thoroughly. Here, in England, we also have a consultation before the operation but very few points were brought to our attention. Now there is a wealth of information on the net which is invaluable to future vasectomees.

Actually here in Oz, they give you a pamphlet and have a consultation before you have the snip. I learned that approximately 1 in 100 men may experience pain after the operation. For many, this pain goes away over time but a small number of men have chronic pain after. This pain can vary from a mild cramp to feeling as if someone's poked your testicles with a sharp stick. In a small proportion of men, the snipped vesicle ends can heal, and reconnect, effectively reversing the vasectomy.

But if you don't go to the Doctor with the initial pain - you wouldn't know that and therefore the psychological effect of 'damaged goods' would come into play without the knowledge that something could solve it ie sex.................perhaps Dr need to be more explicit with their knowledge when men are going for the snip.