Just Sleepwalking ThroughSo many stories.....here's mine.
Got married young (21), had kids young (23), and didn't really pay attention to how my relationship with my wife was being handled. She intended to be in control of everything, money, kids, etc., and I was just happy (passive) to work and come home to someone I shared this life with. We had sex. Usually it was about every other week and always at her bidding. I remember being upset at the frequency, thinking that it was too little, so I kept track for an entire year. 26 times....every other week. When we did have sex it was always quick, do it now, get it over with. Not what I would call enjoyable or passionate. Little by little she began to make excuses like you smell, you're too fat, you take too long..... I'm in good physical shape and know how to take a shower. I remember this happening when my oldest kid was in high school about 10 years ago. Kids are out of the house and the frequency and enjoyability decreased. We were intimate maybe once every other month and this was apparently my fault. I ended up having an affair. Not something I'm really proud of BUT the intimacy and sex in the affair was incredible. I guess I'm not really fat and smelly. My guilt was great and I ended the affair and confessed to my wife. This was two years ago and she has refused to go to a counselor. She say she doesn't want to be told she is wrong. I didn't want to be told I was unappealing. I'm toughing this out but I don't see anything getting any better.