I Live In A Sexless Marriage Too.I know I am in a sexless marriage because I am married to a "passionless" man who leads a "passionless life". In order to have passion you have to incorporate things into your life that bring you TRUE joy, and I am not talking about your spouse. It is never the responsibility of the other person in your relationship to make you happy. My husband comes home from work to enjoy the couch and some nightly extreme TV watching...That is his passion, the TV. The TV is great for people that have true intimacy issues, it allows them to not to have to connect with you or life in general. My husband is 38 this is his first marriage and we have no children, he has no reason to lay around and watch TV all the time. I have verified with his previous girlfriends that this is who he is and what he does in his relationships, this tells me one thing...It is NOT about me and NOT my fault. In a relationship you HAVE TO BE WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR IN ANOTHER PERSON.
If a man wants a woman to "come on to him" he needs to be that guy, a guy that a girl wants to bang. I am no more attracted to a lifeless person than he is to an overweight, unkempt woman who wears sweat pants. A man that is plopped on the couch nightly is not attractive to most women. He has no life, no passion no real purpose for living. Of course when we were dating this was NOT how he "sold himself". I met him in a social setting and he lied his way into my life. He created stories of passion, MANY self-created stories about people he NEVER was and places he had never been. In retrospect that was his passion...LYING. He lies due to being a lifeless, passionless person.
A person who works just "hard enough not to get fired" is not going to be full of passion or really physically outgoing so do things that make you happy and quit wondering when or if a person wants to have sex with you. Meet people that share your interests, read a book, workout, etc.