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Illness And Sex

through illness my wife can not perform any sex sex related ,bless her she has told me that she would not mind if i had sex with another female just as long i did not tell her about it
dragonflylad dragonflylad 31-35, M 2 Responses Mar 29, 2012

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FoT, there are also partners who seek to avoid sex and intimacy. Many people on this forum have one of those - or had one. In a FEW cases, there are legitimate reasons why no intimate behaviours are possible. But these cases are few and far between - and generally constitute the exception rather than the rule.



And some have partners like your's who are willing to engage in affectionate behaviours but unwilling to take this the logical step further to a fulfilling sexual relationship.



Regardless of the reasons, and their validity or otherwise, ALL spouses have the ability to say:

"Darling, I love you. Your pain is being caused by me. I will do EVERYTHING I can to alleviate it. IF it cannot be alleviated because I truly can NOT do anything about it, I will set you free to find someone with whom you CAN share a complete and totally satisfying relationship."



Sadly, we see very little evidence here on ILIASM that this is taking place . . . In the case of the OP, his wife "says" he is free to find someone else for sex, but she may well change her mind if this becomes fact. Whilst it is just a theory, it may be tolerable. When Dragon comes home smelling of another woman, it is quite likely that this "reasonable response" may change in an instant!!

Lets substitute the word "perform" with the word "share".



You are saying your wife cannot "share" any sex due to illness?



She cannot share, with you, nor engage in, ANY sexually intimate pair bonding behaviors? Nothing?



Is she totally incapacitated? Is she in a coma or has some disease such as alzheimers or dementia or serious brain trauma from injury or disease where her mental facilities are such that she cannot give consent to engaging in pair bonding behaviors such as kissing, hand holding, hugs, loving touches, mutual ************, etc?

Exactly the same questions are coming into my head....