Met With Lawyer Today (finally!)So I finally got my meeting with the lawyer - what I thought was mediation - turns out he's a lawyer who specializes in mediation cases, but they actually send you to another company that is a mediation company after you work out some stuff with the lawyer first... not sure why I cannot just do mediation, & I might.
The lawyer I guess is to make sure that I get the most I can according to the law once I start negotiating with stbx - however he is the one that stands to gain financially, as I put all my money in this darn house, and he blew threw anything he ever earned with buying junk and more junk. In our jurisdiction he is entitled to half the house, no matter what circumstances - so it's up to me to persuade him to reconsider. (he did say when we got married that he wouldn't ever take anything like that from me - of course now we get to see if he's really as trustworthy as I always thought, or if he will turn into an a@@ hole upon being "let go").
We did "talk" - me and stbx - about 2 weeks ago wherein he stated he would ask for 40% of the house and full custody of the kids, which is ridiculous as he is in no shape to look after himself let alone the kids!!! Wishful thinking and the lawyer agrees 100% that stbx is in la-la land on that score; it would be EXTREMELY rare for the H to get full custody and in this case it likely would NOT even be SHARED custody if H is that ill (which he IS).
So I'm still more worried about losing 1/2 the house, which is where I had pooled all my hard earned cash this past decade. Again it's just money, but I've been unemployed these past 2 years and was counting on the equity to get me going for the next couple years until this hard spot passes - layoffs are still going on in my city, 1,000's being laid off imminently!
So really why do I want to separate/divorce right away? Not sure. Peace of mind mostly.
Well I hope others can get info they need from my experience today. gotta get to bed