I Live In a Sexless Marriage
I've posted here a couple of times before in the last few weeks. My marriage of 25 years has gradually become more and more devoid of intimmacy and sex owing in part to husband's absence away at work and his ED issues owing to CAD. Because I've been alone so much (me and my teenage sons) I have allowed myself for the first time to fall for someone else who has been working round my house - on and off for the last four months. Me trying to resist him as I don't want to smash marriage up.
The sex was amazing - I suppose for the first time in years I have known what it felt like to desire and to be desired fully. But really I now see it has for me (not the other guy) really been only about sex. I don't think I could end up with the other guy as outside the bedroom we don't have all that much in common. I talked frankly to a great colleague who has really listened - and she says what she hears is that I want what I have with this guy - itimacy - inside not outside my marriage.
The pressure of the affair getting too much - other guy desperate to marry me and endless texting etc and meeting. Can't cope with this double life. . In the end I confessed everything to my husband yesterday morning. We have had a rocky 24 hours but also the most intimate 24 hours for months - slept curled up in each other's arms last night. I think it has been a huge shock for him after 27 years together but also think that we will survive and also that although he is angry (mostly with other guy but also with me) that he says that he has taken me for granted massively. Lots of kissing and cuddling and am hoping for more this afternoon! Pleasae keep yr fingers crossed for me that we can make something positive out of this turbulent patch and move forward. He says that he could not bear to split up and I am the centre of his world, he just hasn't managed to show how much.
The sex was amazing - I suppose for the first time in years I have known what it felt like to desire and to be desired fully. But really I now see it has for me (not the other guy) really been only about sex. I don't think I could end up with the other guy as outside the bedroom we don't have all that much in common. I talked frankly to a great colleague who has really listened - and she says what she hears is that I want what I have with this guy - itimacy - inside not outside my marriage.
The pressure of the affair getting too much - other guy desperate to marry me and endless texting etc and meeting. Can't cope with this double life. . In the end I confessed everything to my husband yesterday morning. We have had a rocky 24 hours but also the most intimate 24 hours for months - slept curled up in each other's arms last night. I think it has been a huge shock for him after 27 years together but also think that we will survive and also that although he is angry (mostly with other guy but also with me) that he says that he has taken me for granted massively. Lots of kissing and cuddling and am hoping for more this afternoon! Pleasae keep yr fingers crossed for me that we can make something positive out of this turbulent patch and move forward. He says that he could not bear to split up and I am the centre of his world, he just hasn't managed to show how much.
By:
ChrissieG
Age:
51-55
,
Female
