He Keeps Telling Our Sons I Am A ****

Probably not the correct title because I am actually a really classy lady, but I am just sick of it. My 17 year old has figured out what is going on. The 14 year old says he does not care but the 13 year old gets very upset. We NEVER have sex, never kiss, never talk about anything other than the news. I continue to work tons of hours, make great money, clean the house and fix dinner. I also do the grocery shopping and pick of his rx's. Last time when we were alone in the living room I told him I could no longer live like this and I wanted an open marriage (so as not to upset the kids). He calls all 3 sons into the living room and tells them "your mother wants to sleep around". This was the second time that this has happened. Actually 3rd if you count what he did 5 years ago. Ok fast forward to last night. I lay in bed by myself and he snuggles up to me. I say "what the h$ll" and "you are sending very confusing messages" I really want him to just leave me alone because I know he is just trying to get something from me though I do not know what. I tell him we have not had sex for years and why is he doing this now. He says "all you think about is sex" Not really, I am tired of being the live in non paid maid. I think some of you may remember me as I wrote at the beginning of the year that I had gone on a nursing travel assignment working 80/hours a week making $$ and the fool never paid the mortgage so it went in to foreclosure. His name is not on my house, no way! I guess he just figured he did not have to pay it. No sweat off his back, doesn't affect his credit and he knows it! The real pain and what has kept me around is his calling me names in front of my sons. He tells them all of our business except that he doesn't like sex or women or intimacy. I even wonder if he is possibly a closet gay. I also think his mother had an awful affect on him. I caught her telling my oldest son one time not to EVER touch himself because it was dirty and wrong and Jesus would not like it. I corrected her real quick and told her to MYOB. How can I get past this with my sons. Can someone give me advice otherwise I am out of here. I even have a plastic surgery consult because I have lost all my confidence in the bedroom though someone (male) told me last week that I am pretty and what is wrong with my husband! I am also the one who lost her mother in March. He has reminded me how he did not like her (actually she did not think he was rigright for me) and she was the sweetest woman ever on the planet. I think I am going to the doc tommorrow as I cannot take much more stress and will end up in the psyche hospital!
HAR1978 HAR1978
46-50, F
3 Responses May 6, 2012

Get out a piece of paper, a really long piece of paper, a pen and draw a line down the middle of it. On one side right all the things that would make it logical to leave him. On the other side all the reasons why to stay. Look at that list. Identify the things that make it difficult to leave, e.g. money. Think about how you can overcome or minimise those problems. Then at least think of acting on it.<br />
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And take your poor kids with you and teach them what they need to know and deserve to know about ************, sex, love and relationships so that they don't end up like their dad. If you achieve nothing else from here on in that alone will be a worthy cause and achievement that would make it worthwhile. Stop the rot in this generation.<br />
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I believe in you. You need to believe in yourself.<br />
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There are potential benefits in seeking help with anti-anxiety treatment to give you a psychological foundation from which to work but there are also potential side effects that may be a challenge to overcome later on. However, if you break down now it is of little value to worry about future withdrawal side-effects. Do what you need to do for now.

Me neither!

Quoting you here - "Can someone give me advice otherwise I am out of here"<br />
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Does this mean that if you get no advice then you will leave this imbecile ?<br />
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If that is so, then I have no advice what so ever to impart to you.<br />
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Tread your own path.