I May Not Be Around Anymore...

...But I do still think about you all quite often. I'd like to give anyone who is interested an update.

I left my SM in May 2010, then my ex fell on hard times and moved into my spare bedroom in September '10 "temporarily".  "Temporarily" turned into "permanently" and I finally decided to move into my own little place in August last year. I posted some updates until 6 weeks after moving, and then went "off the boil" so to speak, only posting a few private blogs about being in a very difficult relationship with someone. It's been a very busy year - well almost a year.  God, it feels like much longer than that! I've changed jobs thrice, had my heart broken, gone from being a tradesman to a "professional" in middle management, and I've learned a hell of a lot in the process.

I had been on internet dating for most of 2011 and had met some interesting people, but I just found the whole thing a bit false, and after moving into my own place, I really lost interest. After things ended with the lovely woman I almost moved to America for, there was another person I had met on EP  that I finally met with after we had both moved out. We ended up having a relationship of sorts. She, only wanting to be friends but being unable to keep her hands (and everything else) to herself and me always wanting to be more than "just friends". Yes, I got "friend-zoned". This situation ended badly for both of us at the beginning of this year and it broke my heart. I was in the darkest place I've ever been in my life. 

January is mostly a place I'd prefer not to go back to, but by the last week of January I was starting to "come right". I knew I would be able to make it through and that things would be alright eventually. Just as I was coming out of this funk, I went to a Saturday-night movie and dinner with some friends and acquaintances, and I met J. We spent most of the night chatting and kissed each other good night. We decided to have a picnic together on Thursday, and we went to a party on Saturday before going for a long beach walk. To say things got heated would be an understatement, but we didn't have sex. She asked me to get tested before we slept together, and I asked for the same in return. The next Friday, both with a clean bill of health, we saw each other again. As one might expect after 2 weeks of foreplay, sex was fantastic. That Sunday I met J's girls, L & K (6 & 9 respectively), and since then they've really taken to me, and I to them. J & I have monopolized each other's free time since then. We've gone camping together twice and spent a lot of time at each-other's houses. L & K run and jump onto me when I arrive there. J has a wonderfully high libido and a day without sex is far more the exception than the norm. I am really very happy with her and she is very happy with me.

Leaving my SM has been the best thing I could have done for myself, and for my ex, who now even has a job. No, she didn't kill herself. We still chat every now and then, and her anger has dissipated enough that we can now laugh about things and enjoy each other's company on the odd occasions we do see each other.

EP, and all you wonderful people in ILIASM gave me so much validation when I really needed it, and for this I will forever be grateful. Without you all, I would not be where I am today. I used to think that once I had left my SM I'd hang around here in ILIASM, but I genuinely don't have the time. I'm not deleting my account or going away, but if the last (nearly) year is anything to go by, I won't be around much. If you want to contact me, please send me a PM.

I wish you all the absolute best. To all of you who are humming and ha-ing about whether to stay or leave, I wish you the strength to make the best decision for YOU, and to all of you who have decided, I wish you the courage to make plans and follow through with them. Remember that the longer YOU remain undecided, the longer you stay stuck in limbo.

Good bye my friends. I'd still someday, somehow, love to meet some of you face to face. 
Iamhere4me Iamhere4me
36-40, M
15 Responses May 8, 2012

Wonderful to hear you're so well mate!! You were a good friend when I needed it xxxx

This popped up on my screen - I hadn't been on in a long time either. I needed to read this tonight, for my own sake! I hope you continue to be in a good place!

What a great post! Love it. And such good news too.

Bye Marco, and tread your own path mate.<br />
<br />

I'm so happy that you're doing well. You're one of my favorite people that I've found here. I will miss seeing you around so much, but I'm glad that you don't need to be here.

Well mate, you made it through the gauntlet and you know there is light at the end of that tunnel and that the pain has been worth it. The lessons learned are worth their weight in gold. Be well.

Yes we were a punch drunk lot back in the day. I am so happy for you. Those days of uncertainty, introspection serve us well, even when we don't know it at the time. I wish you all the best this world has to offer.

Yay! Thank you for the update, it helps more than you can ever know and we DO think about you :o)

It's good to see that lives really can get turned around. Blessings on you my friend.

Thanks Navy!

I have followed your story with interest - like VB and appreciated your comments. I am so glad that things are coming good now. Take care and enjoy!

Wisi, thank you! I'm loving my life right now!

Sooooo happy for you! Thank you for sharing your success story!!!!

Thank you so much for your support Chai.

Rated up!

Thanks mate!

I know where you are mentally and spiritually, because iI am there also. I also understand the need to get on with life. It is difficult trying to move on, and yet to still be here, and yet there are many friends here, and people that care about you and have been there for you. But,It is important to dig into real life, and live, and somehow being here, takes away from all of that. I am thrilled that your job and your realtionships, and life are falling into place. your just a really great person, and i want you to have the life and love you deserve. Enjoy, and may all the blessings in life be yours.

Thanks Neui. It is difficult to get on with life and stay on here at the same time. I'm glad you're well and happy!

I don't know what all the circumflexed A's are for... Thanks EP!