Don’t Kick Me In The Mouth, And Then Complain About How I Bleed….

Just saying… how people respond to your behavior is their choice… and there is nothing you can do or say about it…
SilentThinker SilentThinker
41-45, M
1 Response May 9, 2012

In any relationship, the ball of choices constantly passes from one to the other.<br />
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When one person chooses unilaterally (say in the cessation of intimacy) the ball of choice IS still passed to the other party. If that party chooses to simply let the ball of choice lie inertly at their feet, then your premise - that there is "nothing you can do or say about it" - is basically correct, though it IS still a choice to take this inert path.<br />
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But if you elect to continue with the concept of choice, you might pro-actively choose to do something different (say produce a consequence for the spouses cessation of intimacy). This would then pass the ball of choice back to the other spouse, and it would be incumbent on THEM to choose again.<br />
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Then back to you. And so on.<br />
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A refusives entire power ba<x>se is built on convincing you that you are in a position where you do not have a choice - or a choice so unpalatable and awful that you'll never make it.<br />
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You break through THAT bullshit, and the refusives position collapses like the house of cards it is.<br />
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Tread your own path.