Just One Symptom...I live in a nearly sexless marriage , but this is clearly just one symptom of a much larger problem. I am not sure that my wife ever loved me to start with...well maybe that is too harsh. She would say that she loves me and I think that she probably does, but I don't think that she is truly able to discern how she feels.
She is very self-absorbed with her hobbies and she fills every minute of her day "working." I am not really sure what she is trying to accomplish because she doesn't make much money, and I don't really need the money. I tell her just to cut back and spend time with us, but she keeps focusing on things that take her away from the home.
I have a very successful career and get a lot of internal satisfaction with what I do at work, but she doesn't seem concerned at all with what goes on in my life. It would be nice every once in a while to be able to have an intellectual discussion about what is going on in my life, or at least to feel like she is interested. On the other hand, we spend hours talking about her day; to be honest, I love to hear all about it, but I just wish that she would show an interest in me.
This lack of interest has slowly worked its way into the bedroom. We haven't made love more than 4 times this year, and she often turns me down even though she accuses me of never asking. I get such mixed messages from her and sometimes I feel as if she is just having sex with me out of obligation. I don't want to use my wife as I have too much respect for her. I must admit that I would almost rather find a friend with benefits than to use the one I love for my most animalistic needs. What I really want is an intimate relationship with her, but I don't think that will ever come. We both are attractive and still in our mid-30s, and I know that this should be our prime. I really don't know where to turn or what to do. Sad and frustrated!