I Am Off The Rails

I texted my husband today (after a fight, he stormed off), the message:

U DON'T WANT "WE"! U R a Fuc$ing Hyprocite! Leave me, you coward. His response, he bought me a pack of smokes.

I never posted here before. I've been reading the stories though...which are very helpful. Marries 8 years....sexless 8 years. Lord have nercy.
UnhappyCappy UnhappyCappy
31-35, F
11 Responses May 13, 2012

If you don't know why you are staying, then you need to leave. And you need to look at yourself and figure out why you are doing this to yourself. Granted it takes two to Tango, but you need to look at and take responsibility for your part in this dance.

People will only treat you as badly as you let them.

You don't mention kids and it sound statistically unlikely.<br />
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If so, thank your lucky stars, you're unhappy, fighting and sexless. I think you can do better, and I think so do you. Act on that.

look into your heart and see where it leads you, You gave to get lost sometimes before you can find yourself and your pathway~

Of course she has been initiating for a long time , all of us have been ...and then little by little you feel you are a prostitute in bed ..for your own husband , in your own bed ,in your own home ...why ? for the food he gives you ?<br />
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After a while it becomes disgusting ...to initiate and beg for just a little bit intimacy and passion ...sex is just a way to show our feeling ,show our passion , love , trust ,acceptance ...otherwise everybody these days can satisfy her/himself !

You need out. Sounds like you are a step in that direction. Keep walking, you'll get there.

Why am I staying? I don't know why.

Ok - I think in my anger I may have down played the # of sexual encounters. More like married for 8 years, had sex 12 times. Yeah, that's a more accurate number. <br />

if the marriage was never consummated, you do not actuallyhave a marriage and can get an annullment. incidentally why are you staying?

He should trade in his **** for some thing useful like a tool belt or a can opener...

Do you really mean you've been married 8 years and haven't had sex in 8 years? You need to do something! Can't you do something about it? Can't you initiate sex? Must something you (or both of you can do) can do. What went wrong or what's the issue?

IMHO if it is 8 sexless years, it is only one way- out and fast... Do anybody really believe that it is possible to convert ignorant b****** of 8 years into passionate lover? Everybody here is unbelievably patient! After one sexless year with my husband I honestly can't imagine me want to have sex with him again... And initiate? NO in a million years! The connection just gone forever.... But it is only IMHO...

I agree with you. It is near impossible to iniate any sex. I am no longer attracted (after years of begging, trying to fix it). I am working on an exit strategy.