I Live In a Sexless Marriage

Waalaa...I Wandered Back In...

By: IpheliaPayne

Written on May 17th, 2012

Once again I find myself online...Making some purchases...For things I am supposed to get from the spouse that now come in the battery form of "lovin", lol.

You gotta love life.

By: IpheliaPayne

Age: 36-40 , Female

451 people have read this story

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12 responses

Barganax

I am sure a civilization that built the pyramids would be able to sort out a bee proof cork!

May 18, 2012
2 likes
Barganax

Being sligtly odd (Hey it is Friday) Cleopatra had a vibrator! Apparently the Egyptians had hollow wooden phalluses which they filled with angry bees to get the "hum"

There are a few devices for we men out there but they are built out of tacky materials. Women are more discerning

May 18, 2012
1 like
- sharma7222
  Hi I Am playboy Jaipur plz contact Any woman(17 to 50) for safe sex 8829005670
  
  May 18, 2012
  1 like
- FilteringMachine
  lol, speaking of tacky...
  
  May 18, 2012
  1 like
- IpheliaPayne
  lmao, yes...that was darn near on cue!
  
  May 18, 2012
  1 like
- IpheliaPayne
  I have heard, watched, read...something somewhere that mentioned that about Cleo...I would be scared to death a bee might escape a sting me on my honey pot. What a horrible way to find out if you are allergic or not, lol.
  
  May 18, 2012
  1 like
1 More Reply
88ElmiraSt

Some of that stuff looks like medaeival torture devices. So I was wondering, just why would a guy want to have his foreskin stretched?

May 17, 2012
2 likes
- IpheliaPayne
  If you find out, let me know. I even watched a program about it. This man has made this little thingamajig that attaches to the skin around the head and starts the stretching. I can't imagine why in the world someone would choose turtle dong over the nice, "how ya doin" head.
  
  May 18, 2012
  1 like
nitwitty

Hey, welcome back! I remember you. So sorry you're still dating the Eveready Man, like the rest of us. :(

May 17, 2012
1 like
- IpheliaPayne
  Well hiya nitwitty! Thank you for the welcome back. :-)
  Ah yes, the battery powered boyfriend...he does come in handy...
  Oh that was sooo a pun there!
  (hehehe)
  
  May 18, 2012
  1 like
paxetlux

As a technophile I have to say I am really impressed by some of the stuff that is being produced for you ladies these days. I could be tempted as a bloke to be a tad jealous because to be honest the stuff produced for us is just really still a bad joke. It would appear, as I learnt only recently, that we are still supposed to use our socks; cashmere of course.

I was reading an article only today about the newest toys for girls that are being styled with the same design panache as Apple products. I wonder when someone at Apple will decide to jump on the bandwagon and produce the iDiddle, the interactive, multimedia experience for frustrated real women, ideally with elements of the Wii included. Sales of it would dwarf those of the iPad and the iPhone put together surely? With Apple's cachet behind it, it would probably be respectable enough to get it out in public and show it around all your friends. And could you imagine the possibilities of 'interactive gaming' across the internet? Possibilities abound.

May 17, 2012
2 likes
- IpheliaPayne
  The iDiddle?!? How uttery fantastic would that be! LMAO
  I would have to walk around with it pasted to my forehead, I would be so proud. It surely would have to be a conversation opener...and if the conversation sucked...waalaa...you are already "strapped" with your own entertainment!
  
  May 18, 2012
  1 like

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